Why wasn’t he backing off? I knew the answer to that because I could see something in his eyes that I’d never seen there before. It looked like a second cousin to hope, and it frightened me.
“Because I’m not into shit like that,” I growled, turning to leave, when Jordan stood in my way.
“Because I’m a man?”
“No!”
“Because you’re afraid?”
“I’m not afraid of anything,” I said through my teeth.
“Why then?”
“Because it’s fucking you!” I bellowed, unable to control myself. “Because you… you… You disgust me.”
He flinched, paling. I wanted to hurt him, but after I did, I wished I could hurt myself, too.
It took him a few moments to reply. “You’re lying.”
“I’m not.”
“Yeah, you are,” Jordan insisted. “Because if you were disgusted by me, you wouldn’t have said it. In fact, you know what I think? I think you like me.”
I burst into laughter. “God, you’re delusional.”
He took a step toward me. “Am I?”
A smile dropped from my face. “What are you doing?”
The anger in his eyes turned into something fiercer and hotter.
“Proving my point.”
“Which is?”
“This,” he said, placing his hand on my crotch and making me realize that during our little chat, I got hard.
I slapped his hand away, angry with both him and my dick.
“So what?” I said, faking a laugh. “I need to get laid. I just imagined wiping the floor with your face. Take your pick. Big deal.”
“I want you,” Jordan stated, making me gulp. “I always did. And you know what? It feels great to say it. It feels like freedom.”
“Good for you,” I said, glancing at the door because I needed to get out of there. “If you’re done sharing, can we go now?”
“I like you as well, you know?” Jordan continued, as if he wanted me to hurt him. “More than I should. More than you deserve. More than what is sane, reasonable, respectable, or healthy. I liked you from the first moment I saw you, and I never stopped liking you. I like you despite every nasty thing you said to me and every laugh at my expense. I like you for every birthday card you left on my desk, no matter how mean your note was, because you never forgot my birthday. I like you for every punch you threw on my account, for every nose you broke to avenge me, and for every time you protected me. You can push me away as much as you want, but I will always like you, and there’s nothing you can do to change that, Adam.”
I didn’t know how I found the ability to speak because every word he said felt like a brick hitting my head.
“Thank you, Jordan,” I mocked him. “The feeling is not reciprocated. Now get out of my way.”
“I like you.”
“Stop saying that!”
“What?” Jordan said, looking unperturbed. “That I like you?
I pointed a finger at him. “I’m warning you.”
