Lil’Ballerina:
Have fun.
I climb out of the car and slip my phone into my pocket, squinting to keep the glaring sun out of my eyes. I’d give just about anything for a rainy day. This mid-July heat is overwhelming.
With a new LEGO DUPLO set under my arm, I head up to Ines’ apartment. Santi will start preschool in September, so Ines is planning to go back to work. It’s a relief, seeing her life ease its way back into some semblance of normal. Though with the way I keep my pain to myself, there’s no guarantee she isn’t doing the same.
The moment Ines opens the door, I know something isn’t right. Her posture is tense, her lips pursed into a tight line.
“Hey.”
“Hi. Come on in.” She steps aside, her expression tired.
“Is everything okay?” I take off my sneakers and straighten, catching her worried gaze.
She sighs. “Santi has a fever and a sore throat.”
“Should I leave?”
“No, no, no. Please stay,” she says. “He loves you. Maybe you can distract him. Cheer him up.”
I give her a small smile. “I’ll do my best.”
She loops her arms around my waist, hiding her face in the crook of my neck. “Thank you, Hade.”
I hug her back with one arm, still clutching the LEGO box with the other. “Stop saying thank you. I’m here for you and Santi, no matter what you need. Always.”
She holds on a little too long, so I gently untangle myself and give her an awkward smile.
“Where’s the little patient? Uncle Hayden has come to the rescue.”
A burst of laughter escapes her. “He’s in his bedroom. He’ll be ecstatic to see you.”
With a nod, I follow her down the hallway. If I can make the little dude feel better, I’ll count it as a win.
Around nine,I find myself on the floor next to Santi’s bed, rubbing his back. He felt good most of the day, playing and watchingBlueyand begging me to read to him. Ines worked through her to-do list while I kept him occupied. She even went to the store for more meds. But at eight, his fever returned. I did my best to distract him until the fever-reducer kicked in, and his temperature was hovering around a hundred degrees the last time we checked.
“You’re like a magician.” Ines stands by the door, arms folded over her chest. “He’s never taken medicine from me that easily.”
I give her a smile. I’m happy I can be there for them. On days like this, I don’t feel like a waste of space.
I stand and touch his forehead with the back of my hand again, satisfied when he only feels a little warm.
“Do you want a drink? Or maybe something to eat?” she asks quietly as I step out into the hall.
“Nah. I’m still full. Dinner was incredible.” I ease the door shut behind me. “I better go home.”
Rather than back away or head down the hall, she searches my face, her lips parted.
My heart thrashes inside my chest, and an intense shudder rushes through me when I notice how large her pupils are.
She stands on her tiptoes in slow motion, but I’m frozen, confused. As she moves in closer, instinct finally kicks in, and I turn my head so her mouth lands on my cheek.
My chest tightens. I don’t look at Ines in a romantic way, and honestly, I’ve never gotten that vibe from her either. It’s not us. This is about loneliness, the type of thing that happens when a person’s whole world crumbles. It’s grief trying to find something to latch onto.
When we’re grieving, we often make bad choices. It’s human nature.
She takes an abrupt step back, and the flicker in her eyes tells me I’m right. The desperate look on her face has nothing to do with me and everything to do with the gaping hole Owen left behind.
