“I-I know. I just didn’t expect it, and it sent me spiraling.” She takes a deep breath. “God, you probably think I’m an idiot.”
“Never.” My chest aches for this woman. “And don’t ever call yourself that. Grief is complex. You never know when and how it will hit.”
“Thank you so much, Hade. I have no idea what I’d do without you.”
I force my shoulders to relax and rest my head against the seat. “How is Santi? I have a surprise for him.”
“He’s fine. Every day, he gets better at driving me batty.” She chuckles. “He’s always thrilled to see you, you know, with and without surprises. He loves when his tío plays with him.”
Before long, Santi is begging for her attention, so we end the call. With a deep breath, I pull up the web browser on my phone and type “Sabotage new album” into the search bar. When the results pop up, I click on the first one and read. Every line is like a knife to my heart.
Left too soon…
The talent we’ll never get back…
Insiders claim the album will contain two songs written by Owen…
The article includes several pictures of the band and one of Owen and me on stage in Paris. We stand back to back, playing guitars, huge smiles on our faces. The longer I stare at the screen, the heavier my heart becomes.
Barely aware of what I’m doing, I climb out and rush back inside. The elevator climbs fast but not fast enough. Everything hurts. Images of Owen taunt me, memories washing over me like an avalanche.
I stagger out of the elevator, tears blurring my vision. I tear off my T-shirt and throw it on the floor. In the kitchen, I sink to the tile, back pressed to the cupboard, and stare at the island cabinets in front of me. Fuck, I would’ve loved to turn my thoughts off, even for only a few minutes. Instead, they blare loudly, taking over all my senses.
When the elevator dings, I’m still on the kitchen floor. I don’t know how long I’ve been here, though my heartbeat has mostly returned to normal, thanks to a breathing exercise I used to collect myself. I’m in desperate need of a better distraction, something to push away the dark, oppressive thoughts swirling inside my head.
“Hade?” Riley calls.
“In the kitchen.” The words come out raspy and quiet, so I clear my throat and try again. “I’m in the kitchen.”
Her steps grow louder, and then she’s there, standing above me with concern etched onto her face. “What’s wrong?”
I’m too busy drinking her in to reply right away. Her hair is in a messy bun on top of her head. She’s wearing a white off-the-shoulder crop top and blue jeans. She’s beautiful. She always is.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” She crouches in front of me, her hands on my knees for balance.
“Someone leaked the news about the new album. Ines found out through a gossip blog instead of hearing it from me like I’d planned. She freaked out, called me in tears. After I calmed her down, I looked up the article myself.” I drop my head and lace my fingers behind my neck. “Then, I lost it. It’s a good thing I was in the parking garage when I did.”
She squeezes my knee. “Feeling any better now?”
“A bit.” I lick my dry lips. “But I need a distraction. I’m fucking desperate for it. I’m falling apart, Ry…” I shake my head. “Could we go somewhere? Anywhere?”
She assesses me, her blue eyes depthless. Then, her lips are on mine. Slow, careful. Tentative. But once I kiss her back—it’s fireworks. My desire for her transforms into an all-consuming hunger.
I pull her closer, her skin scorching under my touch. “I don’t think I can stop,” I whisper. “Not when you’re around…”
“Then don’t stop,” she breathes, fingers sneaking to my waistband.
Then, we’re both naked, our clothes scattered across the floor, the condom from my wallet in her hand.
When she rolls it down my length, I worry I’ll lose it and come toosoon. Once it’s in place, I rub circles around her clit. With her lips on mine, she climbs on top of me, hovering over my cock. I keep caressing her clit, preparing her for me.
“I’m gonna come if you don’t stop now,” she breathes. “And I don’t want to come until you’re inside me.”
Music to my fucking ears.
I grip my shaft, holding steady as she lowers herself, taking me inch by inch. When I’m balls deep, her hands on my shoulders, her tight heat engulfing me, I close my eyes. It’s heaven.
“I’m so full…” She moans. “And your ladder with this angle… I don’t think I’ll last long…”
