Felix’s steps become slower as they get closer to Veikko. Then they stop.
For a long moment, silence reigns. The tension threading through the atmosphere tightens to an unbearable pitch. I risk opening one eyelid to see what’s going on, the anticipation becoming too much to bear, even though I have the strangest feeling that I’m in the midst of something I have no right to witness.
Felix reaches out and grabs the glass, downing the shot in one gulp. He slams the glass back on the countertop, the thud of contact sounding like a bomb in the tense silence.
Felix plants a firm hand on Veikko’s shoulder. Then, he kisses him.
My eyes shoot open in shock. I need to make sure I’m actually seeing this.
Both Felix’s and Veikko’s eyes are closed. The kiss is deep, long. It steals the air from the rest of the room. I can hardly suck in a breath.
What the fuck is going on? Shock and disbelief swim through me. I can’t tell anyone about this. I can’t let on to either Felix or Veikko that I was awake. Right? Shit, my brain already wasn’t functioning at a high level today. I’m really not capable of processing all this right now.
Felix pulls back from the kiss. Veikko’s mouth is still open, a disoriented look on his face as his wide eyes latch to the man who just marched in and kissed him.
Felix pours another measure of whiskey into the shot glass and throws it back with a gulp.
He looks at Veikko, then he scoffs. “Straight, my ass.”
Felix turns on his heels and strides back out the door. Leaving Veikko in stunned silence at the kitchen counter. And leaving me with a couple answers about what’s been going on between my two roommates lately—but a hell of a lot more questions.
37
JAMIE
It’s the first game since I saw Felix and Veikko kiss.
Since this time last week, I’ve lost my virginity, had sex with Carmen three more times, and saw my roommates kiss. Did some kind of galactic anomaly happen that unknowingly transported me into an alternate universe? Shit, nothing feels real anymore.
I’m not complaining about the sex with Carmen, though. That feels unreal in a very, very good way.
Not that seeing Veikko and Felix kiss was a bad thing, either, necessarily. I just … have absolutely no idea what to do with that knowledge. I haven’t told anyone. I can’t. I haven’t told either of them that I saw, either.
They’re still not talking. But I don’t sense the same animosity between them that they’d been giving off for the past couple weeks, either. Things seem to be in a strange limbo between them.
I guess we’re about to find out how it affects their playing together.
That question isn’t the only thing that makes this particular game special.
Carmen is in the crowd tonight.
I asked her to come to my game, and she agreed. Maybe she’s starting to feel the same way I’ve always felt, about wanting our relationship to actually be a relationship. Maybe.
I’m going to have to work up the courage to talk to her about it sooner than later. Because the possibility of a real relationship with Carmen is worth any risk.
I look up and find her in the seats. My heart clenches, and the adrenaline already flooding my veins supercharges.
Determination beats through me as I take my position, preparing for the puck drop. Knowing that Carmen’s eyes are on me makes me want to play my fucking heart out tonight.
The ref releases his grip, the black disk hits the ice, and as fucking insane as this week has been, it all rushes out of my mind, and I lock in.
It’s the best game we’ve played in a while. I’m on fire. My reflexes are sharp, my passing is accurate, and I seem to have a sixth sense for sniffing out Michigan’s plays, inserting myself at just the right moment to disrupt them.
Veikko and Felix are playing … better together. Veikko plays a tad stiffer and more clumsily when the play brings us close to our goal, but it’s not like the disaster a couple weeks ago.
We’re up 2-0 by the time third period starts. Right before play recommences, I look up to Carmen’s seat, but she isn’t there. A pinch of disappointment twists inside me, but I easily shrug it off. She could be in the bathroom or going to get a drink. No big deal at all.
A couple minutes later, I’m controlling the puck. When I turn on my blades, my field of vision passes over where Carmen is sitting.
