The guttural rumble pulls me out of my spiral.I quirk a skeptical brow as his previous vow—to make the impossible happen—replays in my mind.
“What, are you going to fix me?This isn’t the same as—”
“You don’t need to be fixed.Stop devaluing yourself.I will not allow you to trash talk the woman I love.”
A record needle scratches in my mind.I blink and wait for him to back peddle or correct himself, but he continues driving as though he didn’t just confess his love for me.
“I mean it, Penelope.Every word.You hear me?”he chides.
I nod.It’s the only thing my body will allow.His tiny, crooked smirk reflected in the windshield superimposes itself in my brain, and I sit in stunned silence all the way to the jewelry store.In fact, even after Sebastian hands the SUV keys over to the flustered valet, ushers me into the fancy designer store, and leads me to the counter, I can’t break through my stupor.
The first few items the salesclerk pulls out are too big and gaudy.When I don’t respond to her sales pitch, she shifts gears and brings out a case from the back of the store.
Two sets capture my attention enough to pull me out of my numbness, but I return the first without a word when I try it on and don’t like the shape of the diamond against my hand.
I slip the other ring onto my finger.A wave of rightness washes over me.The oval cut and simple setting, as well as the smaller diamonds embedded in the engagement band, create a beautiful balance of functionality and elegance without feeling stuffy or flashy.
Sebastian’s phone buzzes in his pocket.I peel my eyes off the ring and marvel at the lithe movements of his muscular forearm and thick fingers as he retrieves his cell.
“It’s my ma,” he says.
My hand moves of its own accord.I squeeze his arm to allay the fear in his voice—and enjoy the hardness of his body.
“Answer it,” I demand.
He nods, his lost expression at odds with his handsome face, and lifts the phone to his ear.Even before he says anything, I know the echo in the building makes hearing his mother difficult by the strain in his eyes, so I shoo him toward the lounge near the restrooms.He kisses the back of my hand and turns away.As his long strides carry him away from me, I can’t help but lust over the display of his ass muscles.I pull my lip ring into my mouth and enjoy the heat blooming low in my abdomen.
A voice from the past douses my arousal.
Every cell in my body ices over.Time slows.I turn my head and meet the source of my nightmares.
Cathy Barbie, the head cheerleader and mastermind behind two years of torture, smiles as she sidles up next to me.I flinch as she flings a boney arm over my shoulders.
I can’t breathe.Her perfume clogs my sinuses.The walls close in.
“Are you finally replacing that piece of shit?”
Her saccharine tone decimates my defenses, and her blithe gesture toward my hand on the counter rips out my guts.As I stand bleeding out, she delivers the final blow with a seemingly friendly pat on my back.My burn scars flare in agony, but it’s nothing compared to the pain in my soul.
“It’s not like Terry cares anymore anyway.She’s been gone for a long, long time, hasn’t she?Go ahead, runt.Replace her.”
Acid eats at my stomach.Bile rises in my throat.
My entire world burns to ash.I slip the rings off my finger and drop them into the attendant’s hand before turning and walking toward the door.
I was wrong for wanting Sebastian.Wrong for dreaming of happily ever after.Wrong for searching for a place to belong.
Wrong for forgetting.
I push against the glass door.Before it fully swings open, thick fingers wrap around my upper arm and halt my forward momentum.
My soul screams in agony.I dare not meet Sebastian’s worried eyes, so instead I stare ahead like the coward I am.
This is the only answer.I need to end things now.
My heart hurts, but I shrug out of Sebastian’s loose grip and push out through the door.
“I’ll never marry you, Sebastian.I’ll never love you.Ever.Leave me alone.Forever.”
