So when I look at it that way, Noelle got off lucky.
But it sure doesn’t seem that way when she wakes up screaming after another nightmare. Or, in the first few weeks after her rescue, when she was too scared to even leave my apartment. When the slightest sound would throw Noelle into a panic and she couldn’t bear to be alone, not even while she showered.
No. It didn’t feel like Noelle got off lucky, then.
Lucky would have never been getting kidnapped at all.
Lucky would have been avoiding Donaldson’s sick obsession with her, so she would never have been targeted by Accetta in the first place.
I still want to kill both those fuckers, even though one’s already dead and the other will spend the rest of his life in prison. With all the evidence against Accetta and the dozens of felony charges against him, he won’t walk free ever again. And if he gets off somehow—lost evidence, police fuckup, anything—I’ll take care of the problem myself.
But lucky or not, there’s still a lot to be thankful for.
Noelle’s alive.
She’s safe.
The wounds on her body have healed.
After two months of intensive counseling, her nightmares and panic attacks have gotten much better.
With her now living at Blade and Arrow for good, I know she’ll be protected when I have to go away for work again. My friends will make sure of it.
Her love for the theater isn’t gone, even though I wouldn’t have been surprised if it was.
No, my incredible, strong, brave Noelle isn’t letting her traumatic experiences control her life.
“I’m not going to let Ken and Dario win,” Noelle told me after one of her counseling sessions. “I’m not going to let them take the things I enjoy away from me. I’m not going to stop working at the diner. I’m not giving up being a stage manager, either. And all those people who died…” She swallowed hard, and her chin wobbled. “They loved the theater, too. I’m going to keep making magic on stage, and I’m going to do it for them.”
My throat goes thick at the memory.
Shit, I love her.
I never knew it was possible to love someone like this. I never knew I wanted to.
But now…
“No?” Noelle asks. As we pass beneath a streetlamp, her eyes sparkle with flecks of bronze and gold. Her lips twitch. “Still not a fan of musicals?”
I kiss her cheek. Then I release her hand, wrapping my arm around her instead. Hugging Noelle close to my side, I reply, “It was great. Really. I enjoyed it a lot.”
Noelle cocks her head. One brow arches skeptically. “Really?”
“Really.” As we stop at the intersection to wait for the light to turn, I give our surroundings an assessing glance. Though it’s past ten PM, Times Square is still buzzing with activity, the sidewalks filled with theater-goers and people out for late-night dinner or drinks.
A frisson of anxiety plucks at me, having so many strangers in such close proximity to Noelle. My muscles tense. When Inotice a man several feet away admiring her, I shoot him a threatening glare. A fearful expression crosses his face, and he averts his gaze. The instant the walk sign flashes on, he darts across the road, casting one last worried glance back at me before disappearing into the crowd.
I’m not jealous, just to be clear. But after what happened to Noelle; first with Donaldson, then Accetta, I’m not taking any chances. Not in New York City, not back in Williston or Newberg, or any other place we go.
After all, obsession can come from anywhere.
As we make our way across the street, I remind myself to relax, at least a little. If I don’t, I’ll end up ruining this trip for Noelle, which is the last thing I want to do. Although she’s been looking forward to coming to New York to see Jaz, I know she’s been nervous, too. After all, this is the first time we’ve ventured further than Williston since Noelle’s kidnapping two months ago.
And as Noelle’s supportive boyfriend, I should be doing whatever I can to reassure her that everything’s fine. That there’s nothing to worry about, despite being in one of the biggest cities in the world, surrounded by strangers who could?—
No.
I slam the door shut on a train of thought that won’t go anywhere good.
