“Would it be a proper birthday without snow angels?”
“And can I get Butterfinger Bites at the movie theater?”
“You can, as long as you save some sweet tooth for the cake I stayed up all night baking for you.”
“You baked me a cake?!”
“Funfetti. Your favorite.”
I threw my arms around his neck, kissing him deeply. “You really do love me.”
Shane framed my face with his big hands, thumbs smoothing my jaw, his eyes on mine.
“More than you’ll ever know.”
Circle of Trust
Ariana
Present
“You made it!”
Grace wrapped me in a fierce hug before welcoming me inside, taking the batch of cookies I’d made from my hands as soon as I was in the door.
“And you brought cookies?!” Grace beamed before turning to yell down the hall. “Ariana brought cookies!”
There was a cheer of joy from where I assumed the rest of the girls were gathered, and I smiled, my cheeks flushing with heat.
I was so nervous I wanted to puke.
I hadn’t had girlfriends in so long, I couldn’t remember what it was like to have a girls’ night. The last time I’d had anything even remotely similar was when I was thirty.
Almost a decade ago now.
But after I moved in with Nathan, I found myself going out with my friends less and less. I was obsessed with Nathan, for one, and fully in love with falling in love. I wanted him to take up all my time. I craved it.
When the honeymoon phase settled, I realized it had been a long time since I’d seen a lot of my friends outside of work or a group gathering. And when I did get brave enough to make plans with them, Nathan would lament my leaving, making a big showof wrapping me up and begging me not to go in a playful, teasing manner. It always ended with us making love before I’d go, and then I was ready to hurry back home to him.
Eventually… I just stopped leaving.
And then when I did want to, it was no longer a playful show of him not wanting me to leave — it was a threatening one. It was him suspicious of me going to a bar without him, asking me how I would feel if he did the same? He twisted innocent nights into me not wanting to spend time with him. He used the fact that he was busy against me, like I should want to spend any time he had at home together. How could I want any more alone time when he was already gone so much?
So, yeah… friends had rightfully given up on me. Who wanted to keep inviting the person who never came, who never invited you anywhere?
My topsy-turvy stomach situation wasn’t helped any by the fact that I’d been a wreck the last week since I’d spent a day with Shane.
I’d felt so guilty that night when I went home, taking a long hot shower as if I could scrub the impure thoughts from my head. I’d tucked the wooden page holder away between books I knew Nathan would never touch, and I lit the candle I’d bought, burning it down to the wick before throwing it in the trash and taking the trash out to the garbage can outside just in case.
When Nathan came home the next day, I swore he’d see right through it, like I was standing there at a crime scene red-handed.
But he didn’t notice a thing.
In fact, he’d been more preoccupied than ever since he returned from his trip. He hadn’t even batted an eye when I’d reminded him of craft night tonight. He’d kissed my forehead before he left for work and told me he’d be out late anyway and to have fun.
I knew he was busy with his new team and staff, but it was rare for him to leave me alone so much.
Not that I was complaining.
