I sank a little lower in my chair. “ZzzQuil. About half the time,” I muttered.
She nodded, pursed her pink lips, and opened the file. She wrote several lines of cursive scrawl before looking back up. “I’m going to make an appointment for you to see Dr. Wallace. He’s a psychiatrist who specializes in sleep disorders. He’ll do a sleep study to see if he can detect whether your issues are physiological or something else. Since he’s a psychiatrist, he can prescribe medication to help you sleep if he feels it’s warranted, Agent Good. Oftentimes, people dealing with PTSS symptoms have trouble sleeping.”
“I thought it was PTSD,” I said.
“PTSS refers to post-traumatic stress syndrome. PTSD refers to the disorder. PTSS refers to resulting behaviors in patients diagnosed with PTSD like you. These include, but are not limitedto increased alcohol consumption, which you’ve admitted to doing in the past.”
“I’ve been sober for eight years, Doc,” I stressed. We’d gone over me being a raging alcoholic in other sessions, so she was well aware of this fact, but it never hurt to remind her.
“Yes, and you’ve sought treatment and still work with a sponsor, correct?”
I nodded emphatically. “Greg, yes, ma’am. I see him all the time, we attend meetin’s on a regular basis. That part of my life is under control. I promise ya, that had nothin’ to do with this shootin’ incident.”
She smiled broadly and shut the folder again before standing up. I did also. “Even if you hadn’t said something, I already knew that, Agent Good. Your reflexes wouldn’t have been sharp enough to kill the two suspects before they shot either you or Agent Smith, had you been consuming alcohol. That being said, I want you to see Dr. Wallace. I know he’ll be of some help. I’ll call his office and make an appointment as soon as you leave. I’ll text you with his number, the date, and time of the appointment, and the address for his office.” She stuck out her hand which I shook. “I’m satisfied that the shooting was justified, Agent Good, and I’ll let Captain Sorensen know as soon as possible. You’re cleared for duty.”
I felt relief rush through me. Thank God. “Yes, ma’am. Thank you, Doctor Daughtry.”
“You’re welcome. Have a nice day.”
“You too, Doc.”
I strode to the office door, wanting desperately to get out of there before she changed her bloody mind.
Chapter Eleven
WES
I had cabin fever, big time. After Patsy left the apartment, I’d cleaned up the breakfast dishes and pulled some steak out of the freezer to thaw for dinner. I’d been smiling the whole damned time. After breakfast, I’d walked Patsy to the door and kissed him for all he was worth before he left. It was amazing how quick and easy I’d fallen into domestic bliss with the intriguing FBI agent. There was something just comfortable about living here in his space, but I also knew I was in trouble because I was already starting to think of it as my space too.
Even though we hadn’t made it to bed yet, I was enjoying taking my time with him. The attraction was mutual; I knew if I stayed here much longer, it wouldn’t take much to take it to the next step. We would become lovers.
The thought of a relationship with Patsy was nice, though, I wasn’t certain I wanted to commit to him. I told myself that I couldn’t possibly choose a better man to fall for, but I’d never done well with commitment. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to fall in love and have kids with a man who’d be my other half someday. I wanted a man who’d be my soulmate. It was just that I never seemed to be able to make relationships last longer than a few weeks. It felt different with Patsy. I honestly didn’t want to disappoint either of us.
I glanced around the newly tidied living room and made a decision. I needed to get out of the house to take a long walk. Easy strolls around Balboa Park where there was a smalllake always cleared my head when I’d still lived at home with my parents, and I was desperate to do just that. Of course, the middle of Hollywood wasn’t anywhere near Balboa Park and there certainly wasn’t a lake within twenty miles of Patsy’s apartment but just getting outside in the fresh air and sunshine would definitely help me feel better.
I pocketed the spare key Patsy had given me and grabbed my jacket before heading out of the house. As soon as I stepped out onto the sidewalk and took a deep breath of fresh air, I felt better. I smiled to myself and headed down the street. The block where Patsy lived was a mix of places. The middle of the street was a combination of houses and apartments, some modern with many units, and even more that were smaller, older buildings like Patsy’s, constructed in the 30s and 40s. Commercial buildings anchored each end of the residential blocks that made up the neighborhood. They comprised everything from gas stations to small strip malls which were in abundance.
Though some neighborhoods in Hollywood were seedy and rundown, Patsy’s wasn’t. The apartment buildings appeared to be well maintained and most of the single-family homes had picket fences with garden gates, old growth trees, and flowers. It was charming. The neighbors seemed friendly, greeting me with smiles and hellos. I stopped to pet a couple of dogs which were being walked by their owners and chit chatted about the weather.
I couldn’t get over the fact of how friendly people were but then realized it had been some time since I’d walked around in anything other than dirty clothes with unwashed skin, and a scruffy beard. I forced myself to put it out of my mind because I honestly didn’t want to dwell on how people were treated when they were homeless. I thanked God that Patsy had walked intoRaj and Rami’s convenience store the night of the robbery. The man had quite literally turned out to be a knight in shining armor. He didn’t wear a heavy suit of metal and he didn’t carry a sword, but he did carry FBI credentials. In this case they amounted to the same thing.
While Rami and Raj were on my mind, I made a left at the corner, deciding to walk over to the store and say hi. It had been several days since I’d been in to visit, when before the robbery, I’d stopped in every morning and usually every evening to catch up with their day, giving a hand where I could. The two brothers had been the only family and friends I’d had in the months after losing Mom’s house while I was living in my car. Old friends had melted away as my circumstances changed and I was too embarrassed to reach out.
The brothers always made sure I got a cup of hot coffee and a sandwich. On very bad days, when I hadn’t been able to get a labor-ready job, their kindness and friendly faces each day had helped a lot. I waved and greeted Raj when I walked in, smiling broadly and getting one in return. He was serving a customer, so I waited until he was free before walking over.
“Wes!” he said, coming around the counter and hugging me. “Where have you been, my friend? I haven’t seen you since the night we were robbed.” He let go and held me out at arm’s length, looking me up and down, showing off bright, white teeth as he grinned widely. “You look so good, so healthy, my friend.”
I smiled back. “Thanks, Raj.” I looked around. “Where’s Rami?”
“Did someone call my name?”
I looked up to see Rami coming down an aisle carrying a box of wine bottles. I assumed he’d been in the back room. “Hi, Rami!”
“Weston! How are you?” He set down his carton and hugged me. “Where have you been? We haven’t seen you in a few days.” He whistled. “You look great.”
“Thanks. Actually, the morning after that miserable night, Patsy Good came looking for me and he’s been letting me stay at his place ever since.”
“Really?” Both men exclaimed at the same time. “That’s great. Patsy’s such a nice man,” Rami said.
