His words hit me like a bitch slap to the face. At the same time, I want to burst out laughing at the craziness of this situation. I grab his shoulders and hold him in place as I choke out my response.
“Hold on! You… you don’t understand.Youare Kodiak.”
He stares at me, dumbfounded. “Huh?”
“Oh, my God,” I groan, smacking a hand against my forehead. “Look, I maybe didn’t know your name that night, okay? Or, maybe I knew it and forgot it, or didn’t really recognizeyou… whatever! I nicknamed you Kodiak because you’re as fucking big as a bear… and because you make me feel the same kind of excitement I had when I got my first Kodak camera. When I said Kodiak that night, I meant you. I was drunk, yes, but I was totally focused on you.”
He doesn’t say anything for several long moments, and we just stare at each other in tense, choking silence.
Then, his mouth curls into a wide smile.
“Wait, soI’mKodiak?”
“Yes, you are.”
To my shock, he cups my face and brings me in for an eager, hungry kiss.
“I want you to be mine,” he declares when he pulls back from the kiss. “Will you be mine? Will you let us try being together?”
My eyes go wide, and my heart starts to hammer loudly in my chest. Like, I’m pretty sure he can hear it. I’m still trying to catch up with everything he’s told me. We didn’t have sex… he didn’t use me and then ghost me. My image of him as a playboy asshole isn’t actually based in fact. I’ve been so mean to him, and there was no reason for it.
Part of me wants to say yes, immediately, but I stop myself. I have to think this through. I have to be rational and not let my desires get ahead of me. He isn’t the guy I thought he was, which is good, but that doesn’t change all the other things that have happened between us. Our fights, sharp words, and animosity. Will that just all go away now?
Plus, I’m not staying here. I’m going home soon, and then what?
“Zander,” I begin in a soft voice, “I don’t think it would work. I mean, I don’t even live in Denver… ”
He smiles, and it lights his face up so much, it steals my breath.
“I’m from Nashville,” he states. “I know that’s where you live. I found that out the first night we met at the bar you threw up on me in. We were there for a game, but I also stopped to visit my sister and her newborn. Carson and Jensen mentioned the girls were going to hang out with you because you lived there.”
Now my heart is really racing, and excitement rushes through me. He’s from Nashville? Then… then it could be possible. Maybe we could actually have a chance of making something between us work.
“You need to promise me something.”
“Anything,” he states. “What is it?”
“No more secrets,” I insist. “And no lies. You should’ve just asked me who Kodiak was instead of disappearing the next day. This all could have been figured out with a conversation. That’s a hard boundary for me, Zander. Got it?”
I have to be able to trust him, which is not an easy thing after what Miles put me through.
“I promise,” he replies. Then, when I don’t answer right away gently prompts, “So?” He’s looking at me so earnestly, I want to wrap my arms around him and never let him go again. “Will you give this a chance? Will you be mine?”
“Yes!” I exclaim. “Uh… I mean, yes, I’ll give this a try.” Dropping my gaze, I squeeze my eyes closed and murmur, “God, I hope those are the only times I’ve embarrassed myself in front of you.”
“Uhhhhhhh… ”
I jerk my gaze back up to him, my eyes wide and I feel the blood rush from my face. He’s cringing. Actually fucking cringing!
“What?” I demand. “What else did I do?”
“I mean… remember the airport in Miami? When you tried to take my bag, insisting it was yours?”
The memory slams through me and I drop my face in my hands with a moan.
“Nooooo, oh fuck, I forgot about that.”
He starts to chuckle and I glare up at him, but I can’t help my smile. The next moment, we’re both laughing our asses off.
