“Probably not,” she said. “But I don’t see a need to put your men onsite any sooner.”
“Agreed. Until then, we should try to get some rest,” Jason said, sinking into the couch. “Four hours of sleep is not a good basis for running something this dangerous, and I want all of us in the best shape possible when it goes down.”
She wouldn’t trade their time together this morning for anything, but he wasn’t wrong. Running on adrenaline was fine up to a point, but if she and Jason had the chance to catch some sleep before tangling with killers, they should take it.
“Any luck with Warner’s phone? Has he taken the bait yet?” Todd asked.
Emma shook her head. “Not yet. He’s probably feeling extra cautious at this point.” He and Byron hadn’t communicated any further either. Both were probably figuring out how to jump ship.
In the meantime, she, Todd, and Jason hashed out the remaining details, and by one-thirty, Todd had left to call his fiancée and then get to work.
She and Jason set multiple alarms and slid into bed after closing the blackout shades. She lay on her back, acutely aware of the man lying next to her. His heat, his scent, the sound of his slow, easy breaths. Staring up at the cracks in the ceiling, her heart beat faster at the memory of the things they’d done in this bed. But there was also a strain between them as she continued to guard her secrets and he worried about his brother.
She sighed. More than anything, she needed sleep, but her brain swirled with thoughts about Jason, concerns and contingency plans for the meetup, and all the unanswered questions about everything that had happened since yesterday afternoon.
Hell, had it not even been twenty-four hours since Jason reentered her life? Given what they’d faced together, it felt like days, weeks even. But also, not nearly long enough.
For the first time in years, she found herself contemplating a real relationship with a man. He already knew more about her job—or at least the wire frame of it—than anyone outside of the Night Herons. That was half the battle right there. Whether or not he could overlook the illegal side of her work was something she chose not to contemplate at the moment, because this was Jason.
Maybe she’d never really stopped loving him, even in her heartbreak. She’d finally forgiven him for his response to finding her with Trey. That night would haunt her forever, but it wasn’t Jason’s fault. Neither of them were the same fragile twenty-somethings they’d once been. And Trey didn’t get to drive a wedge between her and Jason a second time.
The star of her thoughts rolled to face in her in the dark, his deep voice rumbling through her as he said, “I can hear you thinking.”
She laughed lightly. “My brain’s on the spin cycle.”
“Come ‘ere.” Slipping his hand across her hips, he tugged her against his body.
She turned away and nestled into his embrace with a gusty sigh, relaxing into his all-encompassing warmth, both turned on and soothed by his touch.
He palmed her stomach, dropped a kiss on her shoulder, and settled his head on his pillow. “Get some sleep,” he said, his voice drowsy.
Amazingly, she did, waking a couple hours later with the urgent need to pee. Sliding carefully out from under Jason’s heavy arm, she used the bathroom and returned to the bed, watching his dark form as he snored lightly next to her.
Even in the shadows, he was beautiful, the planes and angles of his face arranged as if designed by a master.
But his incredible face and body were the window dressing. Trey had been unfairly handsome too, but he’d been rotten inside, and now that was all she saw when she imagined his face. Jason, though, only became more alluring as she discovered the core of him. He was strong and intelligent, self-sacrificing and generous, aware of his limitations, determined, caring.
Other women saw his perfect features and expected him to be perfect in every way, but no one should have to take on that burden. True love was recognizing that everyone had messy parts, and being willing to take them along with the rest.
Heaven knew she had her own flaws. Who didn’t? Could Jason learn to love hers the way she’d come to love his?
Did it even matter? So many things could go wrong today. And even if they neutralized the threat to their lives, maybe this relationship wouldn’t survive the transition to the real world. Just because he had some idea about her lifestyle didn’t mean he’d be willing to put up with her odd schedule, last-minute meetings, and secrecy long term.
All of this even assuming he cared half as much for her as she did for him. She might be reading too much into their short time together, but worrying about Jason beat rehashing tonight’s plan and the myriad ways it could go off the rails.
She glanced up and found him watching her.
“Hey,” he whispered, reaching out to tuck her hair behind her ear and stroke his hand down her neck to her shoulder.
“Hi.” She shivered at his touch.
“Can’t sleep?”
She shook her head. “Not anymore. I got a few hours though. It’s not even four yet, so feel free to go a little longer. I’ll make sure you get up in time.”
“I’m up now,” he said suggestively, leaning in to kiss her mouth.
She responded eagerly to the soft, enticing brush of his lips, and within seconds they were pressed together from head to toe, devouring each others’ mouths as their hands roamed.
