“Did you join the Air Force to prove that you were more than a model or an athlete?” she asked.
He’d just stuffed his mouth full of fries, and he held up a finger and chewed for another minute. “Wow, right for the jugular,” he said with a soft laugh before taking a drink. “Sure, but maybe not for the reasons you think. I’d been competing with my brother for accolades and attention my entire life, and I wanted to go somewhere completely off his playing field. Pararescue training is competitive, but it was more about pushing each other to be better, rather than to be number one.
“It was grueling and important—and sometimes even fun—and I found true brothers in the experience.” He wiped his fingers on a napkin. “I finally had something all my own, something so far removed from the normal world that no one even realized or cared that I’d played football or been half naked on a billboard.” The passion in his voice was heady. “It was fucking amazing. Best decision I ever made.”
She smiled. “That sounds incredible.” And similar to her own experience in some ways. Interesting that they’d both taken jobs that felt big and meaningful, but also off the radar. Hers even more so.
The fact that Jason understood made her wish they didn’t have such a painful history. Even if he didn’t know the full extent of her work, his military service—especially given that he’d been special ops—meant he understood her commitment to something beyond herself. Something she was willing to forgo a normal life for, to risk her safety for even.
And he was still the sexiest man she’d ever met. Those intelligent dark eyes, those rippling muscles… But that was all icing. More importantly, he made her feel safe, respected. Maybe it was because his ego and his sense of manhood weren’t tied up with him being right or in charge. He didn’t mansplain, or question her knowledge, or assume that she’d welcome his advances. Part of her was tempted to forgive him, in spite of their past.
Clearing her throat, she asked, “How long were you in?” Thanks to Dallas, she already knew the answer, but Jason didn’t need to know that.
“Seven years. Nearly two in training, five as a CRO.”
“Congratulations on making it, by the way. I never doubted you, but I know it’s a big deal.”
He straightened in his seat and seemed to puff up a bit. “Thank you.”
She removed the laptop from her bag and set it on the small table. Unfortunately, this wasn’t a date or a friendly chat. She couldn’t ignore Viktor’s drive any longer. “If you don’t mind me asking, why’d you leave?”
He rocked his beer bottle on its base. “A lot of reasons. It’s hard not to get burned out by the ops tempo and constant deployments, but mainly I left because as an officer, my role was usually torunthe rescue operations. I made sure we had the air and ground support we needed, and that my guys had the skills and supplies necessary to do the job. I was often in the helo with my team, but part of me wanted to be one of the guysdoingthe job, the hands-on lifesaving work.”
“How’d you end up in private security?” she asked as her computer came to life. Hopefully the people around them would assume she was a tourist reviewing the day’s photos or making the next day’s plans.
“What is this? Twenty Questions?”
“Sorry,” she said. “I’m being nosy.” Dal’s background investigation had only given her the basics, not the full picture of who he’d become or why. “Occupational hazard.”
He waved his hand and his lips quirked up. “Nah, it’s fine. I was working as a paramedic when an old PJ friend approached me about working freelance for his new company. He needed guys who could survive without a full-time gig until he got up and running, and I wasn’t enjoying civilian paramedic work as much as I’d hoped. So I cut my hours and started taking on jobs for him.”
She fired up her VPN and let it choose a random location through which to route all of her data. Hello, Utah. After opening the private Tor browser, she navigated to the gardening forum she and her teammates used for covert communication, the “garden” Nat had mentioned in her delirium. “And you liked it,” she said to Jason, pulling herself back from the precipice of anguish over her friend.
“I liked being part of that team again, that tight-knit community. The paramedics I worked with were great, and there was a sense of camaraderie there too, but it wasn’t the same. At Steele, almost everyone is former special ops, all battle-tested, all honorable people I’d trust with my life. Not everyone coming out of the military or special operations is like that, but Kurt’s crew is something unique, something you don’t find in an ordinary job.” He half-smiled and tilted his head just as she looked up. “And the pay’s not bad.”
A little bolt of lust mingled with the growing knot of stress in her chest. Jesus. Great timing.
His smile dropped. “How can I help?”
Some of the tension at the base of her neck eased. Thank God there was one person she could trust right now, at least to watch her back, even if he didn’t fully reciprocate. “Keep an eye out while I go through this?”
He nodded. “I’ve got you.”
And he did, masking his hyper-vigilance with an occasional sip of beer or mouthful of fries.
Emma clicked on the Cilantro thread she’d started years ago and looked for recent comments from any familiar handles.There. TexasTom—actually Dallas, who was incidentally from Reno—had left a message.
TexasTom: Looking for varieties that grow in western Europe.
She posted her own comment without replying directly to his.
LateBloomer2: Some kind of bug has infiltrated my garden. Any idea how to root it out?
“Poor guy,” Emma said, keeping an eye on her private messages icon for a notification. “He’s going to take this breach personally.”
“Who’s that?”
“Free Pen’s one-man IT department. He’s amazing at what he does, but nothing is one hundred percent secure.” She glanced at her watch and did the math. It was almost two p.m. in LA, so Dallas’s response shouldn’t take long once he made sure he was clean. “Those security holes usually work in our favor.”
