“Yep.” He looked around the table, a fond look on his face. “But we can go anytime. Just say the word.”
She straightened and rested a hand on his thigh. “I will.”Not a chance. This wasn’t like one of Cruz’s bar-hopping-until-two-in-the-morning nightmares. She could handle another couple hours of chatting with the most important people in Todd’s world. “I’m going to find the restroom.”
He nodded, dropped a quick kiss on her lips, and then turned to join the conversation between Scott and Jason on his right.
Inside the house, Lindsey found Jenna sitting on a sofa in the family room, nursing her baby. The setting sun had painted the room gold and the pair looked like a renaissance painting, serene and shining.
The blonde looked up and smiled. “Thought we’d take a minute away from the chaos.”
Returning the smile, Lindsey said, “It is a little overwhelming.” She felt a pang at the sight of the woman and her baby. Would she ever have children of her own? Could she have a family with Todd?
The notion took root in her heart like a weed in a garden. She’d always wanted a husband and kids in a vague, “someday” kind of way. But now, her vision was sharper, and she could only imagine that future with one man. Except she had no idea how they were going to make this relationship work, let alone build a life together. She’d have to leave LA, leave her family. Because, now that she’d seen Todd with his friends, she couldn’t imagine asking him to give them up.
“You’ll get used to it,” Jenna said, as if it was a foregone conclusion that Lindsey would become a permanent fixture. “Mick and I live in South Carolina, so we’re not with the whole group that much, but Tara’s my best friend, so we come up to NOVA fairly often.”
NOVA. Todd had told her earlier it was shorthand for Northern Virginia, the part located in the DC metro area.
“Oh,” Lindsey said. “I thought your husband worked with Kurt too.”
“He used to, but not at Steele. He and Dan and Kurt were PJs with my brother.”
“Ah.” Lindsey had been reduced to single syllables. She needed a chart to keep track of all the connections. “Does your brother live close too?”
“No, he died in Afghanistan while working as a contractor.”
Damn. She’d put her foot in it now. “I’m so sorry.”
Jenna nodded. “Me too, but that’s what brought me and Mick together, so it’s bittersweet.” She patted her little one’s back and forced a smile. “Anyway, I’m happy Tara finally met someone who treats her well. She deserves it.”
“She and Jeff seem great together.” What else could she say? All of the pairs here seemed like #couplegoals to her.
“They are. And our boys have become fast friends. Tara just needs to have a baby quick so this one will have a someone close to her age too.” She laughed, righting her clothing as she stood. “I’m mostly kidding.”
Lindsey wanted to be around to see that. And Alyssa’s baby. And all of the big events for the most important people in Todd’s life. “Fingers crossed,” she said. “Can you point me to the restroom?”
“Down the hall, second door on the left.”
“Thanks.”
After doing her business, Lindsey washed her hands and checked her appearance in the mirror. She didn’t have Tara’s impeccable style, or Jenna’s fresh-faced looks. She wasn’t a pilot like Caitlyn, or a tech genius like Valerie, or a former aid worker like Alyssa. She felt boring and plain next to their amazing accomplishments and incredible beauty.
But Todd said he loved her. And so far, he’d backed it up with every action. If he’d never gotten scared and pulled away, would she doubt him at all?
Maybe. But that was on her, not him. And she was done letting guys like Cruz define who she was and what she believed about men.
The entire group of honorable men outside this room loved their wives and girlfriends and children, and weren’t afraid to show it. They were tough but also compassionate.
And Todd was one of them. Unique, but with the same characteristics. Like no man she’d ever met before.
If he said he loved her, she chose to believe him. Nothing could guarantee their relationship would work out for the long term, but she trusted him to give it his best.
Just as she would. Because she loved him too, and he deserved to know it. Time to stop guarding her heart, to stop running from being vulnerable. So far, opening up to Todd had only brought rewards. Her body flushed as she pressed the spot on her upper thigh where he’d left a light stubble burn.
How wonderful could things be if she completely dropped her armor and went all in?
She reapplied her lip gloss and gave her mirror image a nod.Tonight. She’d give him the words tonight.
Her phone—still the temp phone from Marti—dinged. Mom had been checking in nonstop, and Lindsey felt a twinge of guilt for not returning to LA directly. But she’d wanted Todd to have a chance to square things with Jason. And she’d wanted to meet, and personally thank, his friends for their help and support.
