Jessica's eyebrows immediately lift, her eyes widening slightly. "What about her?"
"It's a long story," I respond, still not certain if I want to explain it and even if I do, how do I go about it. “It was a ve—” I begin to go on but then the words get caught in my throat and I stop, suddenly feeling short of breath.
Issa and Jessica look at each other for a few long moments and then Issa nods as if they had had some kind of silent conversation. She stands, turns to me. "Are there extra blankets and stuff in this closet?" She asks, pointing toward the door at the end of the bed and I nod.
Issa walks over and opens the door, starts pulling blankets out and tossing them on the bed. Jessica gets out of the chair, dragging it slightly away from the wall and turning it around. She goes to the chair on the other side, dragging it over and placing it a few feet from the other, also positioned to face the wall. Both women disappear out the bedroom door only to quickly return, each of them carrying another chair which they place in alignment with the others. I continue to watch silently, completely baffled by whatever they think they're doing. Issa picks up an arm full of blankets, motioning to the one at the end of the bed. "Put that one down on the floor."
Jessica immediately grabs for it, following Issa’s instructions, and then she's beside me, reaching over me and grabbing a bunch of the pillows that were strewn across the side of the bed. They work together unfolding blankets and hanging them up over the chairs, creating a tent over the blanket and pillows on the floor. Finally, I ask, "What are you two doing?"
Jessica turns a beaming smile on me as she replies, "What does it look like we're doing, silly?"
“Obviously,” Issa adds, "We're making a fort."
I grimace, uncertain what I should be saying to what appears to be a completely ridiculous project at this point in time. They go back to ignoring me, securing everything in place and then disappearing beneath it.
There's some rustling and some muttering before a soft glow of a light shines from the narrow space that's not covered by a blanket. Issa sticks her head out, beckons me closer. "Aren't you coming?"
She doesn't wait for me to respond, just disappears back inside and I lie there for a moment, torn, wanting to join them and also being afraid to join them. Finally, I ask loudly, "But why?"
Then Jessica pops her head out as she replies, "What better way to hear a ghost story than in a fort?"
She's staring at me wide-eyed, the distinct eagerness quietly shadowed by questions unasked and unanswered.
I roll off the bed, crawl the short distance to the edge of the fort. Easing my way through the opening of the blankets, I’m pleasantly surprised by the cozy interior. Issa pats the floor beside her and I scoot over, mirroring her crisscross position. Jessica and Issa work together to put a blanket around my shoulders, pulling the edge of it over the top of my head like a cloak. I pull it across my front, securing it, and then watch with a sheepish smile as Issa and Jessica do the same. We all squirm around until we're comfortable and then Jessica looks at me and says, "I can't even imagine what has happened to have you bring up Lilith."
“As I said, it's a long story," I begin, but then Jessica rests her hand on my arm beneath the blanket and says, "You're always welcome to share anything you feel, but know that you don'thave to. All of the story, or part of the story, or none of the story. I'll still tell you whatever you want to know."
The lump in my throat is back, so I nod, and she goes on, "Lilith is the most kindhearted, genuine, giving, meanest, bloodthirsty, cold-hearted hellcat I've ever met."
I blink at her and laugh rather nervously as I say, "Well, that's an interesting description."
Issa laughs and responds, "Well, that's because Lilith is a very interesting creature."
We fall silent, each of us momentarily lost in our own thoughts. But then, after a while I finally whisper, "She saved me once."
Jessica smiles and responds, "That doesn't surprise me. Pretty sure she has saved us all at least once."
I blink at her as I ask, "Really?"
"Lilith has this great reputation of being the big destroyer, but what people don't realize is for every person she's destroyed, she’s saved countless others."
I find it comforting how they don't question my statement, they don't pressure me for more information. "I always knew, deep down. And not just from the decades of therapy and talking the unknown scenarios right to death. For as far back as I can remember, I had intermittent, faint memories, little bits and pieces that never fit together. But I chose not to delve too deep for fear of what the truth would hold."
Jessica's laugh comes out almost bitter she says, "A lot of people feel the truth will set you free, but in most cases, the truth is better off fucking right off."
"I agree with that," I respond. "Like it's fine for me to get the gist of what went on, but I will never need thedetails."
“Yes,” Issa states quietly. "That's where thedevillives."
I nod, suddenly completely overwhelmed with emotion. I choke on a sob, immediately working on breathing through thestabbing pain in my gut. A tissue appears in front of me and I take it gratefully, dabbing at my suddenly watery eyes. Issa and Jessica watch me quietly, neither judging nor demanding, just silently supporting me.
After a few long moments, I take a deep breath, expel it slowly then manage to say, "So the abbreviated story is that my mother and her mother somehow engineered my conception. They forced my existence onto the world with the intention of using me as a pawn. And then they hid me in a dark corner while they went on with their lives, continuing to manipulate and blackmail until finally, one day, my father, with the assistance of Lilith, saved me.”
It amazes me how speaking the words out loud, even without any of the details, lifts some of the weight from my shoulders. And the gazes of these two women, open and honest, lacking judgment, only increases this feeling. I sniffle a few more times, blow my nose. "So that's where Ren and Declan have gone. My grandmother, may she burn in hell, is long dead. But now my mother is out there labeled as rehabilitated and allowed to go out into society as she sees fit."
"So, they're going to find her?" Jessica asks softly.
I nod, "I know not everyone would want to face their abuser, but after some consideration I've decided that I need to."
