“I won’t tell him anything right off the bat. If I get a coffee with him, or lunch, it’ll be an easy way to get to know him. I want to see if my interest is just a flash-in-the-pan, or something…more. If we go out a few times during the day, and I start to trust him, I might then consider going on a real date.”
That thought sent shivers down her spine, but despite her trepidation, the tremors weren’t all bad. Some of them were a little…thrilling, if she were honest.
“Wow. I mean…wow,” Stat replied, a little less stressed, as evidenced by the fact that he’d started in on his food again.
Petula’s meal had been pretty much forgotten, but now that she’d shared her worries with Stat, she managed to eat a few bites.
“I know. Right?” she pondered. “This wasnoton my Bingo card for today.” She chuckled uncomfortably. “What if…?” Petula swallowed and started again. “What if I decide I like him, but then I can’t…you know, do anything about it.”
Petula wasn’t a virgin. She’d ended up trusting two guys she’d known in college, enough to at least find out what sex was all about. Those two, one in junior year, and one as a senior, had gotten her over what had once seemed an insurmountable hump. For that, she was thankful. Neither short relationship had lasted, so unfortunately she’d never been able to overcome her other…difficulties.
Statler closed his eyes, then opened them with new resolve. “If you decide you want him as more than a coffee buddy, Petti, you’ll have to start by telling him about your past.”
Her heart fell. That’s exactly what she’d thought Stat would say.
He continued. “It wouldn’t be fair to let the guy fall for you if you can’t, you know, commit to everything a full relationship entails. He has to know what he’s up against so that, one, he doesn’t scare you and hate himself for it, and two, he has information with which to form and execute a game-plan.”
He chuckled to lighten the moment. “There’s nothing a military guy appreciates more than full intel before heading into an op.”
Petula snickered, because Statler, per usual, had found a way to amuse her. “Is that what I’ll be, Stat? An op? And Julian will be heading into enemy territory?”
As quickly as his humor had emerged, it dissipated.
“You’re not the enemy, Pet, but your past could be. And I’d hate for that to ruin what might be a very good thing, which could happen if you don’t give Julian the information he needs to deal with it.”
Of course, no surprise, it was exactly what her inner voice had been telling her.
The question was, did she dare? Did she have that kind of pluck? Was she ready to put everything about herself out there to see if Julian could accept her and move forward accordingly?
Stat was a guy. Maybe…
“If it were you?” she rasped to her brother.
He tipped his head to one side, avidly listening.
“If a woman you were interested in laid that kind of heavy stuff on you, could you handle it?”
There was no hesitation. Stat reached out and covered Petula’s hand with his own.
“If I thought she was someone I could love?” he speculated, getting a far-off look in his eyes. “If she were someone I wanted for more than just a casual relationship?”
His gaze snapped back to Petula’s with resolve. “Then, yes. I’d not only handle it, I’d make sure the woman got everything she needed from me to thrive and flourish; to become the person she was always meant to be, whether she ended up sticking with me or not.”
A single tear traced down Petula’s cheek as she turned her hand up into her brother’s grasp.
“Thank you, Stat. You’re the best. I… I think I’m going to give it a try.”
CHAPTER 5
Julian was runninghis final errand of the morning, but things had taken much longer than he’d thought. It seemed like everywhere he went, people wanted to talk. Normally, that would be okay, because he needed practice with his civilian communication skills, but today, not so much.
He looked at his watch, anxious to get back to the office as he left the boat dealership, which was his last stop. He was really happy to have finalized the purchase of Diver Downeast’s first Zodiac RIB—rigid-hulled inflatable—a Yamaha F90 motor, and a trailer for towing. He’d personally purchased their new baby, having saved more than enough money during his twenty-five years in the service, to buy it ten times over.
So,no sweat.
His brothers and their wives had been pumped when he’d called the office to tell them their new boat would be delivered sometime in the next couple weeks, and after that bit of business, he’d managed to get Tabbi on the line, solo, to ask if Petula had shown up yet.
She hadn’t. But if Petula followed her normal schedule, she’d be rolling up to the shop door, soon.
