She tilts her head, eyes narrowing. “You’re not going to add a sarcastic insult after that?”
I tilt my head. “Why would I?”
“Because you usually do.”
The honesty of that lands like a soft punch. I hold her gaze. “I don’t want to do ‘usually’ with you.”
Her breath catches. Not dramatically. Just a little hitch. “Well, alright then.” She nods, like she’s not sure what else to say to that.
“Alright then,” I echo.
We sit in the quiet after that for a beat. We lock eyes. The bus is suddenly too small. Her voice drops. “Why does being seen make you so nervous?”
Because every time I was seen before, I got taken apart. Because wanting someone gives the universe a target. Because I don’t trust good things to stay. But those are my old answers. I’m trying something else this time. “Because I don’t know what happens next,” I sputter truthfully.
Sadie studies me. “We don’t have to know next. We just have to know now.” It feels too simple.
“What’s now?” I ask, voice lower than I mean.
Her gaze flicks to my mouth, then back to my eyes like she’s caught. “Now is just us spending time together.” She pauses. “Us not pretending there isn’t something here.”
The way she says us should scare me. This time, it steadies me. Before I can overthink it, I reach under the table and hook my pinky around hers. She freezes at first, but then her finger curls back, tightening. The contact is tiny, but it feels like a damn bridge. Neither of us says anything. We just hold on while the highway unspools under us.
Hayden takes a phone call up front. Mikey complains about Georgia traffic. The bus rolls on. Sadie’s hand stays with mine. At a gas stop, Mikey and Hayden hop off for snacks. Sadie and I stay seated, still linked like we forgot how to stop. She glances at our hands with a shy edge to her mouth. “You’re being bold today.”
“Don’t get used to it.” I smirk, arching a brow.
“I might want to.” The flirt lands clean and warm.
I grin wide because I can’t help it. “Yeah?”
She tilts her head. “Yeah.”
I should say something slick, but for once I feel brave enough to say the truth. “Good.”
Her smile softens. God, I’m in trouble.
We pull into Atlanta just before noon, the skyline rising through heat haze. The venue is already a hive, crew visible in the distance like a moving engine. The tour machine never stops. It just shifts gears. Sadie lets my hand go when the bus slows. Not because she wants to, but because we’re back in the world now.
I stand, grab my guitar case. She shoulders her camera bag. We step down onto Georgia asphalt together. Close. Not touching, but no longer pretending. Sadie glances up at me, eyes bright, a question there. “You good?”
Different question now. Not are you okay with your demons? But are we okay? I answer with a brush of my knuckles over the back of her hand, and smile.
Her mouth curves wide enough to hurt me in the best way. “Cool,” she whispers.
We head toward the arena. Toward soundcheck. Toward the next few days with me trying to keep choosing her without freaking out about how much I want to.
I’m not fixed.
But I’m walking beside her.
And for now? That’s forward.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Dean
A Thousand Days
