“It is far from paradise.” He takes the tissues from me, blows his nose, and disappears into the bathroom. Water runs in the sink. He returns with a fraction more composure. “The longer I spend in this realm, the less I want to return.”
“So stay. Zoe said her lieutenant wanted you to join the Bureau.” For a brief moment, I can almost picture a future where I’m still alive. Where Gabriel kisses me like I’m his oxygen and the Blade is nothing but a painful memory.
“Seraphiel will never allow it.”
Those five words send me crashing back to reality so fast, I’m surprised I don’t break a bone. Or three.
“You can’t…I don’t know. Protest? Appeal? Go to Celestial Resources and tell them Seraphiel has no business managing anyone?”
With a wry laugh, he shakes his head. “There is no HR Department for angels. The Almighty does not concern herself with our petty disagreements.”
“But this isn’t petty. This is Seraphiel abusing his power.” I’m on my feet again, my mind spinning with outrage. I don’t know why I think I can fix this. How does that saying go? Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons because you’re crunchy and taste good with ketchup? Me trying to outwit one of the Seraphim is like an ant going up against a dragon. Still, I can’t let it go. Not when Gabriel looks at me like he can’t quite believe I’m real.
“You said humans have free will. That fate was…well…”
“I believe my exact words were ‘complete and utter bullshit.’” He smiles, and though his eyes are still sad, the beauty it brings to his entire being is almost enough to render me speechless.
Almost.
“If we can choose our own path, why can’t an angel? Sin and Maddox live here. So there’s precedence.” I plant my hands on my hips, daring him to challenge my logic.
“Sinclair and Maddox are not archangels. Mad was only allowed to stay because Azrael did not want to admit he’d fucked up and allowed a vial of celestial sand to fall into the hands of a coven of witches determined to live forever.”
“Well…shit. What about the other archangels? You said…one of them was a defender. Could he—wait. Celestial sand? There’s sand up there?”
When Gabriel laughs, he does so with his whole being. He braces his hands on his thighs, almost gasping for breath. Fresh tears gather at the outer corners of his eyes. “Fuck me. I am crying. Again.”
“But I bet it feels a lot better this time.” Winding my arms around his waist, I rest my cheek against his chest. I have to remember this moment. How strong and steady he is. The sound of his heartbeat. The way he holds me—like I’m precious, but not fragile. His scent.
Fate might be complete and utter bullshit, but magic is very real. Generations and generations of whisper keepers have all chosen to end their lives. If none of them could find a way to destroy the Blade, my chances are about as good as the chance of finding a four-leaf clover in the middle of the desert.
“I wish I could stay,” he says, his lips skimming over my hair. “Leaving you…will destroy me.”
Kunchin isin the dining car when we venture out for food. We’re somewhere in the Sierra Nevada mountains, and a light dusting of snow makes the trees sparkle.
The yeti holds a delicate cup of coffee in his massive fingers. His three-piece suit is slightly rumpled, and I wonder what he looks like to everyone else. Probably some sort of stockbroker. Or a basketball coach.
“How do the perception filters work?” Most of the lunch rush is gone by now, and I keep my voice just above a whisper.
Gabriel runs a hand through his dark locks. “It is a form of disguising magic. Killian is quite good at those types of spells. I am certain he would love to explain. In great detail.”
“What if it fails? How would he know?” The server drops off menus and two bottles of water. I take a healthy swig from mine as Gabriel levels me with his stare.
“There would be screaming.”
Water shoots up my nose, and I start to choke. He’s out of his chair in an instant. With one hand on my back, the other pressed to my heart, he closes his eyes. Warmth spreads through my entire body, and after more than a few decidedly unfeminine grunts and one awful snort, I can breathe again.
“Warn me next time,” I rasp.
He arches a brow. “About what? You asked me a question, and I answered.”
He’s still holding me when the server returns. “I’m all right now, Gabriel. You can…uh…let go.”
The loss of his warmth is shocking. So is the confused look on his face. But it’s also cute. He has no idea how funny he can be. Or what an effect he has on me.
We order—a grilled cheese sandwich for me and a veggie burger for him—and then the awkward silence sets in.
Even Kunchin—at the bar across the room—notices. He mouths, “Are you okay?”over Gabriel’s shoulder.
