I laugh, but it's a nervous laugh. One that does nothing to actually break the tension between us. “Good point. Though you could be bi. Not that it matters to me.”
“I’m not.”
“But you’re still scared.” I reach for him, and proving my point, he stiffens the instant my fingers brush his cheek. “If you don’t even want me to touch you, this isn’t going to work.”
He lowers his gaze, and mine follows, landing on the rather obvious bulge in his loose pants. “Didn’t think you were blind.”
This time, I can’t manage to do anything but ball my hands into fists and shove them into my pockets. “Fucking and touching are two different things. And while I’ve done the former more than once the past few years, that’s not why I came here today. I haven’t stopped thinking about you since we met. Not because I want a casual fuck, but because for some reason, you’re the first person in a really long time I want to touch. To know. I’ll take things as slow as you want, but you’ve got to give mesomething, Quinton. Talk to me.”
He scrubs his hands over his face, and it’s so obvious he’s been hurt. Badly. By someone he trusted. If I could, I’d find the asshole and…well, probably do something I’d regret later.
“Slow.” The word is barely audible, strained, and the plea in his voice? I’m not sure I can resist it. “I can try…slow.”
He meets my gaze, and all those emotions I saw a moment ago are still there, but behind them, I think I see a glimmer of hope.
“I have to be at work in two hours. Shift at the Unicorn tonight. Let me give you my phone number, okay? Texting is slow. We can start there. Maybe work our way up to coffee.”
He nods and passes me his phone. Once I add my number, I press the device back into his palm and let my hand linger on his for a long moment. “Text me so I have your number too?”
When he sends me an ice cream cone emoji, I chuckle and save the number. “You signed your email Q. Do you prefer that to Quinton? Or Quint?”
All of a sudden, he shuts down. Like a switch. Like someone slammed a lid, trapping all his emotions, everything that makes him a person, deep inside.
“Not Quint,” he whispers. “Anything but Quint. Fuck. This…was a mistake. You should go. I’m a bad bet. Always have been, always will be. I'm sorry, Graham.”
Quinton scoops up the kitten, holding her to his chest, and limps awkwardly to the door. He fumbles for the locks, only to realize they were all open, then mutters under his breath, “How could I have been so stupid?”
“Stupid? Q, Quinton, tell me what’s wrong.” I don’t raise my voice. He’s scared enough as it is.
“I can’t. Please. Go.”
Every protective instinct in me rears to life at the pain in his voice, but if I say anything, do anything but leave, I’ll lose him forever. Hell, from the look in his eyes, I already have.
He shuts the door so quickly, it almost hits me in the ass, and I know I should walk away and never look back. But I can’t.
“Q?” I press my palm to the door, hoping he can still hear me. “You know how to find me. Whatever I did wrong...fuck.” There’s nothing I can say to chase the abject terror from his eyes. “Just know I’m sorry.”
My heart aches as I walk away from the closest thing to a romantic connection I’ve had with another man in years. I’m almost two blocks away when my eyes start to burn and a lump forms in my throat.
It’s better this way. Ry and Dax want to expand Hidden Agenda, and that means a larger team. I don’t need any more complications in my life. Especially one who’s too scared to talk to me.
Then why, with every step I take, is my inner voice telling me I’m full of shit?
Chapter Nine
Quinton
“You know how to find me.”
Sharp pain zings up my left leg, pulling me out of my thoughts. “Dammit, Manny.”
“Scale of one to ten? How bad is it today?” my physical therapist asks. Despite the concern in his voice, he doesn’t stop digging his knuckles into my hamstring. The man’s a sadist. Of course, that’s what I pay him for.
“Seven,” I grunt. “It’s been a good couple of days. Are youtryingto ruin my streak?”
“I’m trying to maintain it, Mr. Silver.” Pressing even harder, he waits until I yelp, then eases off a bit. “You know the only way to keep making progress is through hard work.”
“Sadist.”
