In the bathroom, she took care of her needs and pointedly refused to look at her reflection in the mirror. Ever since the vampire had given her back some of her sight, she’d tried to remember what she looked like. And now that she had the chance to find out, she was too scared to raise her eyes.
Quickly, she stripped out of the borrowed sweater and yoga pants and folded them neatly, needing Peter’s arms around her, his warmth, his strength.
Returning to the bedroom, she gaped. Flames flickered in a gas fireplace built into the wall, heating the room and Peter sat on the bed, still fully clothed.
“These old mansions are drafty as fuck,“ he said when she burrowed under the covers. “Do you want an extra blanket too?”
“No. Just you.” For the hour or so the rest of the group had been fighting, she’d slept in his arms, and she’d found a measure of peace she ached to have again. Now, even this short distance between them was too much.
He started to climb into bed, and Sameen stopped him with her hand to his chest. “You don’t have to sleep in your clothes, Peter.”
“You’re not ready—”
“Let me be the judge of what I’m ready for.” With a huff, she reached for the buttons on his flannel shirt. “I just watched you strip and shift into a wolf. And when you found me, we were both naked, remember? I’m not going to have sex with you, but...I want to feel your skin. Please?”
He swallowed hard enough she could hear it. “It’s not...pretty.”
“What isn’t? Your body?” Sameen pulled up the hem of her t-shirt. “What about this? I’ll always have this, Peter. Even if we...win. Even if the Thirteen are dead and gone, they branded me. And I can’t destroy it. Can’t scratch it off of me like Liam did. Can’t heal a part of it like Farren. If I didn’t think we might need it again to find Mara, I’d beg you for a knife and cut it to break their control, but even if I did…the mark won’t ever go away. So tell me why you’re so ashamed of your scars, when you don’t seem to care about mine?”
“I wasn’t strong enough,” he spat. “Shit.” Jerking up, he started to pace. “This fire elemental who came after Cade—Mara’s sister—she used a charm to stop us from shifting. Wolves heal quickly. Broken bones, cuts, bruises...once we shift, they go away. We don’t carry diseases, don’t ever get sick. But that fucking charm stopped me and Livie from shifting for days. Cade...she kept him as his wolf for almost a year. That’s why Livie and I aren’t...whole.”
“Whole?” She wriggled until she was sitting up, her back against the headboard. This wasnota conversation she wanted to have lying down. “So, because you were burned, you’re not whole? Then what does that make me? I havetheirsigilbranded on me. It’s never going to go away. Not even if we defeat them. You’re talking about your scars like they define you. If so, I’ll never be more than their possession.” The first tears spilled onto her cheeks, and she swiped them away, more angry than she’d ever been—that she could remember.
“Sameen, shit. I’m sorry.” He knelt on the bed, too far away for her to reach, and scrubbed his hands up and down his thighs. “You’re not their possession. You’re smart and beautiful and when you get angry, your personality...” A sound that might have been a laugh escaped his lips, and he shook his head. “You told me earlier that you didn’t know who you were anymore. Who you were supposed to be. Well, I see that woman now. Telling me I’m a fucking idiot who needs to stop feeling so sorry for myself and grow a pair.”
She gaped at him, shocked not only at her own brazenness, but at how quickly he’d taken her words to heart and managed to help her see her own truth in addition to his. “So take off your shirt,” she said. “Pants too. And hold me.”
He only hesitated for a moment before grabbing the hem of his shirt and yanking it over his head. Even from a few feet away, even with her eyes only partially healed, she could see the reddish raised patches of skin. He grunted as he got to his feet and swore softly, lifting his left leg to step out of his jeans. “Broke my hip in the fire,” he said, refusing to look at her as he got under the covers. “Dislocated my shoulder and fractured my collarbone. We were on the run. Two of us trapped in wolf form, injured. Wasn’t like we could just find a doctor. Or a vet. Not with Katerina after us. Liam stole a van and drove us to Canada, and once Livie and I could shift back, we left for Ireland.”
“Come here,” Sameen said. He scooted closer, and she ran her fingers over his left arm, across his chest, and all the way up his neck. “All I feel is you.”
“I couldn’t even carry you back here after Eli cast that protection spell this morning.” The words escaped like he was admitting his greatest shame. “Liam had to do it. You’re my mate. I should be able to take care of you, and I can’t.”
“You carried me earlier.” The thought of being his mate didn’t scare her as much as it had just a few hours ago, but this wasn’t the time to figure out why. He needed her now, and after everything he’d done, how he’d protected her, given her back her choices, a piece of herself she thought she’d lost forever, all she wanted was for Peter to see himself the way she saw him.
“For all of a quarter mile.”
Sameen snuggled against his chest, relishing his warmth and letting her legs tangle with his. The idea of taking things further terrified her, but this? This felt...right. “It doesn’t matter how far you can or can’t carry me,” she said as she let her eyes drift closed and breathed in his scent. “You gave me something I didn’t even know I needed.”
“What?”
“The chance to find myself again.” Resting her hand over his heart, she relished in its steady beat. “I haven’t yet. Not completely. But...I’m getting there.”
Chapter Fifteen
Peter
He was burning. Trapped under a large wooden beam, the sound of screaming all around him. His wolf howled, and he heard Liam’s weak voice somewhere behind him. “Livie!”
The female wolf whined, and Shawn called her name. “I’m coming, Liv!”
“Peter. Fuck me. Hang on.” The tall, beta wolf stood over him, naked and covered in soot and bloody scratches. The pain etched on Liam’s face as he hefted burning wooden beams and pieces of concrete off Peter made him whine and whimper, but Liam would be able to shift as soon as he’d freed Peter and heal any injury.
The left side of his body felt like it had been burnt to a crisp by the time the debris had been cleared away, and Peter scrambled up on all fours, his wolf still in control, desperate to get away from the flames before he shifted back into a man.
“To the water,” Liam ordered. “Don’t stop. She won’t be able to hurt ya’ there. I have to find Cade!”
Peter tried to run, but all he managed was a slow, agonizing limp. The bay was only two blocks west. He could make it.
