“Yet here you are, in my bed.”
“That was not my choice. And you’re an ass.”
Her huff makes me smile and wish I could see the indignation on her face. I know she’s soft. Real curves. Silky hair. Dark brown, I think. Pale skin. “What color are your eyes?”
“Brown. Now are you going to tell me how this is supposed to make me feel better?” After a shaky breath, she settles, and I keep quiet, waiting to see if she really does trust me enough to do what I asked her to do.
The sheets rustle, and then warm fingers rest against my shoulder blade.
“Keep ‘em there, darlin’. All night if you need to. You’re not alone. Whatever happens tomorrow, we’ll deal with it together. But for tonight, just know you’re not alone.”
Evianna’s shudders slowly taper, and I close my eyes, hoping this isn’t one of the nights I wake up in a cold sweat, screaming. The world starts to fade away when I hear, “Dax?”
“Yeah?”
“How’d you know?”
“Know what?” Careful not to spook her, I shift onto my back, and her hand moves with me, coming to rest on top of my shoulder.
“This. It’s like…you’re real. And touching something—someone—real…I can’t describe it,” she says with a little sigh.
“It grounds you.”
“Yes.” Her fingers move a little lower, closer to my heart. “Is this okay?”
Say no. Turn back over.
But the warnings in my head don’t stop my lips from moving. “It’s fine.”
“So…you do this with all of your hysterical clients?” Her voice carries a teasing tone under the exhaustion.
“No,” I say with more force than I intend. An intense emotion warms my chest, a desperate need to reassure Evianna that she’s…special. “You weren’t hysterical. And I’ve never brought a client here before.”
“Oh.” She edges closer, her warmth seeping into my hip. “At my house…how did you know I was in trouble?”
“I was coming to apologize to you. I was…an ass in the car. I heard glass breaking. And you tried to scream.”
“You don’t need to apologize. I…I think he would have killed me if you hadn’t been there.” A shudder wracks her body, and I ache to put my arms around her, but settle for covering her hand with mine. “You can be an ass all you want. You saved my life.”
“Don’t.” I have to put a stop to this. If I let the darkness inside me escape, it’ll destroy this woman I might already care for—even though we’ve only known one another for two days. “Don’t make excuses for me, Evianna. I know how I acted.”
The few minutes I spent holding her after the attack soothed an ache I’ve lived with for so long, it felt like it was a permanent part of me. But in the middle of her hallway, feeling her soft curves pressed against me, her breath tickling my neck, fingers digging into my sides, I felt…whole. The ache is back now, stronger than ever.
Get over yourself. You’ll never be whole again, and if you keep this up, sooner or later, she’s going to learn just how broken you are and she’ll never look at you the same way again.
Her other hand brushes my upper arm. “Why are you so hard on yourself? I wasn’t exactly the picture of empathy and understanding either. You’re human, Dax. You’re allowed to have a bad day.”
“It’s not a bad day. It’s…” More. Everything. “This is who I am.”
“Is that really what you think?” She scoots a little closer. “An ass would have ignored my crying and gone back to the couch. You are a mystery, though. I’ve never seen anyone move like you do. You fought like you could see. And then…you knew exactly what to do. You…care. Even though you don’t want anyone to know it. That’s who you are.”
Evianna’s fingers tighten on my arm for a brief moment, but I don’t move. If I do, I’ll say something I can’t take back. Soon, her breathing slows and her entire body relaxes.
It’s enough. This one night. This is enough.
But…is it? She needed me to ground her. Now…she’s the one grounding me.
11
