I can’t take Ryker away from Seattle. Not when he’s finally accepted Inara and West as family.
“You won’t. Pretty sure he’s head over heels for you,” Inara says as she gathers two mugs and starts back for the main room. “Now…about that secure video connection you talked about?” She checks her watch. “Royce should be headed to bed in a few minutes. I miss him.”
* * *
After I createthe encrypted video channel and show both Inara and West how to use it, Ryker and I disappear into our bedroom to give them some privacy.
Our bedroom.
There’s nothing in this empty space but sleeping bags, our luggage, a few candles, and an open medical kit along one wall. It could be any room in any house. Belong to anyone or no one. But…over the past two days, it’s become ours.
“Does it hurt?” I ask as I brush my knuckles along his jaw.
“A little.” He doesn’t shy away from my touch, and I run my hands down his thick, corded arms. So much pain. But…something’s changed. His body no longer vibrates with tension every time he breathes. A piece of him has…settled, even here.
“The first thing I noticed about you were your eyes,” I say as I trace the scar below his left lid. “The colors. The way you seemed to see right through me.”
At my smile, his gaze turns sad. Almost wistful.
“I can’t. See through you. Fuck, Wren, every time I look at you, I want to know what you’re thinking. Because I can’t…tell.” His voice roughens, and he looks down at my hand splayed against his chest.
“You only think you can’t tell. Try.” Levering up on my toes, I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him in for a kiss. He tastes like coffee. Like strength and safety and a hint of toothpaste. And as I tease my tongue against the seam of his lips, I inhale his unique scent, stealing his breath as my own.
Ryker slides his hands under my ass and lifts me so I can wrap my legs around his waist. I can feel his heart thud against me, and he turns so he can press my back against the wall.
“What do I want, Ry?” I gasp, our lips so close, they’re still touching. “What do Ineedthat only you can give?”
He sets me gently on my feet and smooths a hand over my hair. “You want to know me.”
“Yes,” I breathe. “All of you.”
Ryker steps back and strips off his shirt. His pants fall to the floor next, then his briefs, and he’s naked in front of me. Despite the number of times we’ve been intimate in the past week, we’ve mostly been fused together. Or shrouded in darkness. I’ve seen glimpses of him. Of his massive chest, his eight-pack, his well-muscled thighs. His impressive, and already erect, cock.
Now, the soft glow from the candles illuminates his scars. The way one shoulder is a little lower than the other. He flexes his fingers, and a knuckle pops. The toes of his right foot are misshapen, and a thick scar runs down the outside of his ankle.
Fifty-four. Fifty-four bones.
I meet his multi-hued gaze, intensity turning his eyes a deep blend of blue and hazel. “You’re the most beautiful, impressive man I’ve ever seen.”
“We should get your eyes checked.”
“Do you think I care about this?” Taking three steps forward, I trace one of the thicker, uglier scars along his ribs. “Or this?” My lips press to a rough, almost sandpaper like patch of skin along his collar bone. “You rebuilt yourself. Took the shattered pieces and put them back together. I want to know you. Yes. But I also want you to see yourself for who you are.”
“Who am I?” Ryker asks, his voice so faint, I have to strain to hear it. Years of sadness and pain etch lines around his mouth, wrinkle his brow.
“You’re one of only two Green Berets who survived Hell. You’re a righter of wrongs. A leader. A protector. A good man. Someone who will sacrifice anything—everything—for those he cares about, but who doesn’t feel like he’s worthy of a single person caring about him.”
With every word, the tidal wave of emotions churning in his eyes consumes more of him, until he grabs me in a fierce embrace and crushes me to his chest.
“I’m not…I don’t deserve—”
I dig my fingers into his sides to shut him up. “And you’re the man I love.”
Several seconds pass, and I’m not sure he’s even breathing. I peer up at him, and tears glisten on his stubbly cheeks.
“Ry?” I’m too short and held too securely to kiss the drops away, so I tighten my arms around him and feather my lips over his heart. “Talk to me, Ry.”
He draws in a deep, shuddering breath before whispering in my ear. “You know me, Wren. You’re…the only one.”
