“No, but she’ll keep the baby safe.” He switched lanes as the world became even more of a whiteout on the nearly deserted road. “Trust me.”
She did. Completely. “So, um, should we talk about the shower? I mean, what you said?”
He kept his alert gaze on the storm, and his hands seemed relaxed on the steering wheel. “It’s the truth. Doesn’t change anything.”
She gaped at him. “You still think you’re not going to make it.”
He frowned. “I just can’t make promises. I have to make sure Talia is safe before I do anything, and I can’t plan until then. Can’t fight until then.”
She understood putting the baby first. They both had to do that. Plus, their entire romance was first created on a lie and then full of intrigue and danger. What would they be like in an ordinary life? Could Denver even have an ordinary life? She studied his profile. In the overcast afternoon, his features were all angles and hard edges. Could he take his skills and rough history and be a family man? Was it even possible?
Or was it the rebel in him—the man who faced danger and fought with guys holding knives that intrigued her? She sighed and settled back in her seat. Maybe he was right and discussing their relationship, such that it was, right now was silly. But still. She had things to say. He cared for her, and they needed a chance together. She couldn’t let go of that hope. “I don’t want you to sacrifice yourself. I want us all to live through this.”
“That’s the goal.” He still didn’t turn from the road.
Yeah. Terse sentences and no help. The man had been distant and preoccupied for the entire trip. No doubt he was planning his raid, but it seemed like something more. “Why won’t you tell me how you feel about having a sister?” she whispered.
He leaned over and flicked the heater to a hotter temperature. “Your seat should be heated. Do you have it on?”
“Yes,” she snapped, her chest aching.
“How are you feeling? I mean, after the time in the cold?” he asked, also increasing the speed of the windshield wipers.
So he didn’t want to talk. She’d learned that sometimes he needed to process before talking. Perhaps he was mulling over his conversation with Madison and just wanted to figure it out before sharing. Of course, being so understanding last time was how Noni had ended up alone and wondering where he’d gone. “I’m fine. My toes still ache a little, but I have feeling in them, so I’m not worried.” Should she let him off the hook or should she push him?
“Open the laptop and bring up a map I downloaded of the Boise area, would you?” he asked.
Her shoulders tensed, but she did as he asked. “There are tons of ranches and acreage around Boise and up against the Payette River,” she murmured. “How are we going to find where Dr. Madison has started to build her new compound?”
“Land records,” Denver said simply. “Once we get settled at the ranch house Ryker hopefully is leasing right now, I’ll hack into the local land-use organizations and trace companies that don’t look quite right.” He rubbed his chin and stared out at the swirling white mess outside. “Or maybe businesses that look exactly too right.”
She tried not to feel isolated. They were together right now, and they were headed to get Talia. Somehow. “I want to go on the raid.” Her daughter would need her.
He didn’t answer.
That was kind of an answer all by itself.
“Denver?” she asked.
“No.”
All right. Now he’d answered. “I don’t want to go in guns blazing, but I want to be there the second you find her.” Noni’s arms felt useless without the baby, but explaining that would just sound crazy to somebody who wasn’t a mom. And she considered herself a mom. She really did. Fear made her voice tremble. Was her baby okay? “I have to be there for her, Denver.”
He switched lanes again when the potholes on the slow side got too deep. “I understand.”
“I can be behind you guys but still have a gun.” She had to believe they’d find Dr. Madison, so it was good to make plans for that eventuality. “I need your support in this.”
He turned down the heat.
Temper and fear competed in her chest. “You’re not talking to me right now.”
“I’m thinking and trying to drive in conditions we shouldn’t be driving in,” he said calmly, not looking at her.
The roads were pretty bad, but he could still talk. Though perhaps giving him some quiet time would convince him to include her in these plans. In his thoughts. Heck. In his life. “Fine,” she mumbled.
He drove for about twenty more minutes and then reached over and took her hand.
Warmth and strength instantly enveloped her, running up from her palm straight to her heart. It was a small gesture, but it was something.
