She nodded. A chill skittered down her back, and her stomach churned. For the rest of the Realm, she needed to appear calm and determined. But with Garrett, she could be herself. “I’m frightened.” God, she was scared—on so many levels. What if she failed?
“Then don’t go.”
Why did men try to fix everything with an absolute? While she wanted to tell him everything, she just couldn’t admit the horrible sense of foreboding hanging over her head and tightening her neck muscles into a headache. “We have the chance to end a terrible war that has cost us so many lives. Good lives. How can I not go?”
“Is peace worth your life?” Garrett’s jaw hardened.
“Yes.” She drew out the response, while truth filled her with regret and fortitude. Surely her fear of failure was coloring her entire outlook right now, although maybe not. Sacrifices were made in war, and more important, to gain peace. “I don’t want to die, but if that’s what it takes to find peace for our people, I’m okay with it.”
“I’m not.”
She shook her head, drawing on a courage she’d stored up for a decade. “Don’t get me wrong. I want to live, and I’ve given this a lot of thought. This isn’t ego or a quest to be a hero or to fulfill any destiny.”
“Then what the hell is it?”
“A chance for less bloodshed.” There had been so much for nearly two decades. Vampires, witches, shifters—even Kurjans and demons, who were the enemy. Too many people had died.
Enough death, and she didn’t want to be included in the toll at the age of twenty-five. “Besides, we’ve taken every precaution possible. Just because I don’t see visions of myself after the peace talks doesn’t mean I don’t have a future.”
“That doesn’t make sense.” Garrett’s nostrils flared in warning of his rare temper.
“Sure it does.” Unfortunately, fate never played fair. “Maybe the peace talks will change the future for all of us, and thus I can’t see any outcome until after they occur.” Oddly enough, the idea made sense to her.
The sun grew in brightness, and Garrett glanced down at her neck. “You think that’ll bring you luck?”
Janie lifted a shoulder and fingered the silver horseshoe necklace her best childhood friend, Zane, had given her on her fifth birthday. How the shiny gift had made it from the dream world where he’d presented it to reality remained a mystery. “Luck can’t hurt.”
“You sure about that?” Garrett scuffed his size fourteen boot in the dirt.
“He saved your life.” Janie elbowed her brother, who recently had been kidnapped by Kurjans, their monstrously creepy, white-faced enemies who couldn’t go into the sun, unlike the vampires, who enjoyed the sun. Zane had rescued Garrett as a favor to Janie.
Garrett shook his head. “Yes, but we don’t know why he helped me. Zane is only half-vampire, and I’m pretty sure his other half is more dominant—whatever that may be.”
Janie rubbed her chin, nearly burning with curiosity. She and Zane had met in dream worlds her entire life, and she’d seen him change from a good-natured vampire into something else when he’d moved to live with his mother’s people after his vampire father’s death. “Maybe he’s a mystical dragon who will save the world.”
Garrett snorted. “There’s no such thing as mystical dragons.”
“Most people don’t believe in vampires.” Janie had no clue what genes thrived in Zane, but they had to have some good in them.
“No. My guess is that he’s a shifter—a member of an outlying clan that does not align with us. That makes us his enemy, and if he wants to attack, doing so while we’re preoccupied with the peace talks is great timing.” Garrett softened the harsh words by sliding an arm around her shoulders.
“Zane helped you, Garrett.”
“Just because he saved my life doesn’t mean I won’t take his. If he’s a threat to you.” Garrett tugged her closer.
Janie shook her head. Her younger brother should be joking about going off on adventures and meeting girls—maybe hitting the beach somewhere tropical. Definitely not talking about killing another soldier. The mantle of responsibility had landed as formidably on Garrett’s head as on her own.
A shadow fell across them as their father approached. “Janie?” Talen asked.
“I’m ready, Dad.” She smoothed her calm smile into place and released Garrett.
Talen looked down at them, his golden eyes softening. “I don’t like this.”
“Me either,” Garrett muttered, standing to his full height.
“Then it’s a good thing we all believe in fate.” Janie hugged her brother and fought as tears pricked the back of her eyes. Clearing her throat, she pushed away. “I’ve already said good-bye to Mom and that I’ll see her later tonight.”
Talen nodded, looking beyond vampire dangerous in tactical gear and wearing his heading-to-battle expression. “We’ve been training for weeks. Do you understand the plan and all escape routes from the meeting cavern?”
