“Yes, and I am also continuously reminded that you are no damsel in distress where I have no need to play the knight in shining armor charging to your rescue.”
Aislynn’s mouth tightened slightly. “I understand you are feeling a lack of scrutiny on this investigation but there is no need to throw my words back in my face when you have not considered the possibility that you might have met your match when it comes to this particular game of cat-and-mouse.”
“Everyone makes a misstep at some point,” he reiterated firmly, but some of the tension seemed to ease from his shoulders. “But you are right. I should not be taking my frustrations out on you. I suppose I am overset because this murderer is bringing back too many memories that I would have preferred to leave buried.”
Something made the ice return to her veins. “What do you mean?”
She wasn’t certain he would reply, but when he spoke, his words were soft, distant. “The way this man kills his victims–” He released a heavy breath. “They are almost identical to the actions of my father. Although his victims were not just actresses on the stage, the manner in which they died is eerily similar.”
“What are you saying?” she whispered, afraid that she already knew the answer.
His expression was almost painful. “I am starting to wonder if I cannot find the man responsible because the killer is tied too closely to me.” She saw him swallow hard. “That I might have regressed as I always feared and I am the one I am searching for.”
It was torturous to speak the words aloud, to wait for the look of horror that would surely cross Aislynn’s face as he voiced his concerns. He had told himself time and again that there was no earthly way possible that he could have left Spade’s, gone to Covent Garden and murdered Miss Wilkes and returned home to await the messenger in such a short amount of time. Then again, Cordell was not discounting any possibility at this point, even if it might incriminate himself. He couldn’t help but wonder if something dangerous and deadly had been unleashed inside of him when he’d lost himself so completely with Aislynn. He had certainly felt as though something had broken free, but perhaps the harsh truth was that something had just merely… broken.
“Do not be ridiculous.”
A harsh laugh escaped him. “Am I? Because I am not so confident in myself.”
Aislynn hit the roof of the carriage and it came to a slow, shuddering halt.
“What are you doing?” he demanded.
“I am leaving this asinine conversation.”
Before Cordell could react, she had turned the handle and stepped down to the ground, slamming the door on her exit.
Muttering a curse, Cordell quickly followed suit. By the time he’d tossed a coin to the driver and caught up to her she was halfway down the street, her skirts swishing angrily with every step she took. “Aislynn?—”
She turned on him, her finger poised in the air toward him. “No. You do not get to address me so informally if you are simply going to discount yourself in such a way. I will not stand for it. You are not your father, and the only villain I can currently see is the devil sitting on your shoulder whispering that you are not worthy of happiness or love.”
She exhaled heavily and while a quick glance around proved that there was no one within direct earshot, Cordell did not care to have such an intimate conversation in the middle of the street. He grasped her elbow and steered her toward a nearby alley, thankfully without any sort of resistance.
However, when he released her, she made no attempt to yank her arm away in a show of defiance. “I need to be at the theatre getting ready for tonight’s performance, yet, here I am arguing with you. Again.”
Despite his doubts and self-loathing, Cordell found his lips began to twitch. “It does seem to be a habit we share of late, does it not?”
He was glad when her perfect lips kicked up in one corner. “I daresay neither one of us is willing to concede on this subject.” She tilted her head and crossed her arms, staring at him pointedly. “At the same time, I will not accept defeat. If I was not already convinced of your innocence, my body would not have responded to you the way it did, I can promise you that.”
Cordell could feel his breathing change, deepen. “I want to believe that I am not the monster that I fear will rear its ugly head someday. You have no idea how much I do not want that to happen, to be able to live a normal life with a family—” He broke off when his words began to clog with husky emotion. Clearing his throat, he added more firmly, “But I have long given up that hope. It is why I am determined others do not share the same dark fate. I will not lose you to this threat should it cost me my life.”
She lifted a gloved hand and placed it on his cheek. “I am not going anywhere, Cordell.”
Time slowed to a halt. Her breath was escaping her slightly parted lips in a soft, white cloud. He did not feel the cold and although her cheeks were rosy from the winter air, it didn’t appear as though she noticed it either.
The temperature was rising between them and he could not retreat from it any more than he could retreat from his own failings.
He reached out and pulled her to him, crushing her against his chest as he brought his mouth down in a sweet assault that left them both clinging to each other. Cordell was starting to become afraid with how much he needed her, how much he relied on her to be there when he didn’t realize he was looking in that direction.
He knew it was wrong to drag her down further into the depths of his personal hell, but devil take it, he could not restrain himself.
When they parted, she started to reach for the fall of his trousers. “I want you, Cordell. Let me prove that you are not alone in these battles. I am here for you, if you will just let me into your heart the way I let you into my body.”
Cordell clenched his jaw so tightly he wondered if it might crack. He could not engage in a carnal relationship with her in such a dangerous setting as if she was some sort of dockside whore or one of Mary’s courtesans, but he found his shaking hands starting to lift her skirts. How could he deny them both what they wanted when she was as essential to him as his next breath? He slid his hand along her core to find her wet and ready for him. He guided his cock to her entrance and, with an urgent thrust of his hips, fully impaled her. She would have cried out but he swallowed the sound with another kiss. Grasping her hips, he urged her to lift her legs. She wrapped them around his waist and threw her arms across his shoulders and clung to him as he began to ride the passionate tempest threatening to drag them under and drown them both.
If this was the way he would die, he was not averse to such a death.
Over and over again, he slid in and out of her until he was nearly delirious from the pleasure of her feminine walls. They clenched him tightly, urging him to take more, the friction building until there was nothing left but the ecstasy that awaited.
