The grip on her arm tightened slightly. Not enough to cause pain, but combined with the look on his face, he hoped it was enough to convey his seriousness. “Every word that was written about me was true. I did it all. I was the most worthless rake that you could ever hope to meet. Anyone would have warned you to steer clear from me and with just cause. I would court a lady just for fun and discard her at the earliest opportunity. The thought of being with anyone for long turned my stomach. I was with my last mistress for four months. It was the height of any relationship I’ve had thus far.” Elwood found that once he had started speaking, the words wouldn’t stop. This confession had been long overdue. “I brought you here because I thought it would be a lark, have a bit of fun before you went back to London, but there is… something about you that I can’t explain. I just know that I’ve never felt this way before. It’s madness, it’s absolute insanity, and I have no idea how to react to it, except make a complete fool out of myself, apparently.”
His mouth crooked, hoping that she would laugh at his attempt at a jest. But her continued silence was almost condemning. She looked ill, as if she had bitten into something unsavory. And for the first time in his life, he started to feel true fear. “I know I don’t have the right to ask you to stay, but I would make it worth your while.”
She stilled. “You’re asking me to be your mistress again?”
“Yes. No.” He shoved a hand through his hair. “I don’t know. I just know I don’t want whatever we have to end yet. I don’t want you to go back to London.”
She exhaled slowly. “You know it’s impossible for me to stay and retain my reputation. I would never survive the scandal.”
“You think I would just toss you to the wolves when we parted?” He shook his head. “I might be a scoundrel, but I’m not ruthless, as much as you might believe me to be. You would bewell compensated.” When she looked back over the distance of the rolling hills beyond, he put a finger under her chin and urged her back around to face him. “Say something, please.”
CHAPTER 13
Meliah wanted to tell him that she appreciated his candor, but the fact he had taken her to his father’s hunting box with the sole purpose of seduction made her wonder if the words he spoke now could hold true. For a man with such an unsavory background as Elwood had lived, could it be possible for him to know anything other than deceit?
This entire endeavor had been foolish. She should have never thought she could take on a man like Lord Belmont. She had been naïve in the extreme to think otherwise. And to believe she had the talent to compare to someone like “The Belle.” It was another folly she must regrettably face. It would be best if she ended things now before any more damage could occur and return home, confide to her parents what she’d done while praying that they would forgive her reprehensible actions.
“You need to take me back to the village.”
He released his breath and she could hear the relief as he did so. His hands dropped back to his sides. “I would gladly let you talk to anyone you?—”
“I wish to secure passage back to London.”
He had been about to release the brake, but at her statement, he paused. “What?”
She dared to lift her gaze to his and tried to look past the sudden flash in his blue eyes. “You heard me.”
It took a moment for him to recover. “You won’t even consider my proposition?”
She softened her tone slightly. “I appreciate your honesty, but committing to something that dangerous is a bit… more than I am willing to agree to right now.” She glanced down at her lap. “Besides, it’s likely for the best that this association ends between us now before things get completely out of hand.”
“Association?” he laughed with a bitter tone. “Is that all you believe us to be?”
“It doesn’t matter what I believe,” she snapped in return. For a moment, their gazes clashed. “Since you were so open with me, allow me to be the same. You asked if something was bothering me this morning and I realized I was staring at a plate of ham and eggs.”
When she paused, she could tell he didn’t follow.
“That is a luxury that not many people in my world dare to hope for,” she explained softly. “The truth is we are nothing alike. I might wish for something different, but it shall never be. I need to accept that, just as you are an earl and are expected to do your duty to your family and your line with someone who properly fills that role. Commoners and the peerage don’t mix, unless it is during a special event where the downstairs servants must cater to the upper floors.”
“Meliah—”
She held up a hand. “You cannot contradict me on this because you know it’s true.” He clenched his jaw mutinously, but remained silent. “That is why I’m telling you to let me go now, to send me back to London. We both know the article I meant to write was a sham. I could have never gone through with trying to destroy anyone’s reputation beyond repair, should they become my worst enemy. I certainly couldn’t have done it to you, andalthough I would like to stay, I must begin to think rationally. The fairytale has ended and I would do well to return to reality.”
He regarded her for a long time, and then seemed to resign himself to her decision, “Very well.” He flicked the reins and continued toward the manor. “But I refuse for you to take the mail coach when I can take you there myself.”
Tears stung Meliah’s eyes. The prospect of accepting his illicit offer had been entirely too tempting. The single thing that kept her from saying yes wasn’t just the doubts about his sincerity, but she was afraid that when he decided he was done with her she wouldn’t be able to withstand the despair of leaving him.
She was grateful when they finally reached the manor so that it might give her time to collect her thoughts, but when she noticed a coach sitting in the drive with the crest of the Marquess of Traverson emblazoned on the side, the breath froze in her lungs. It didn’t help that she heard the earl mutter a curse beneath his breath. “Stay here.”
As he climbed down from the curricle and tossed the reins to a waiting groom, Meliah gathered her skirts and climbed down as Lord Belmont disappeared into the manor. She wasn’t certain what his father might be doing there, but neither did she intend to allow cowardice to keep her immobile.
The last thingElwood needed was this unwanted interruption. He had told his sire that he was handling things with the sale of the hunting box, so he didn’t understand the reason he was there. Not only that, but he was hoping to mend things with Meliah, to compel her to stay with him so that he might convince her not to leave.
“Ah, there you are.” Elwood hesitated as his father came walking forward from the direction of the study. His voice did not sound pleased. “I was told you had gone into the village.” He paused and if possible, his expression turned darker. “With some gel that you’ve invited to stay here.”
Elwood held up a hand. “You don’t understand. We?—”
“Spare me any further excuses,” his father snapped. “I am well aware of your continued exploits. I was hoping that the distraction of the hunting box might have reminded you of your duty to the family, but I found it difficult to ignore the threat of scandal when you are mentioned every time I turned my back. I daresay I have been hoping you might curb some of your appetites and settle down and start a family. Now I have begun to despair you ever shall. I came here, hoping to learn that the rumors being circulated are unfounded, only to learn you are cavorting with some woman who, no doubt, has loose morals.”
