Miranda had never dared to ask how bad Anthony’s wounds actually were—both physically and emotionally—but she found the courage to do so now. “What happened to him?”
“I don’t know the full extent of his injuries,” Jacob said grimly. “We weren’t in the same unit, but if it was anything like the men I saw fall around me…” He stopped and swallowed hard. He spoke very little of his time on the battlefield to Miranda, and if Catharine was to be believed, he was rather tight lipped on the subject with her as well. Perhaps that was his way of dealing with such a terrible tragedy. But everyone was different. Her brother had been spared most of the horrors, but not everyone had been so fortunate. Some might have been better off if they’d perished on the field. Or in Anthony’s case, at sea.
Miranda reached out and grasped her brother’s hand. “Thank you for letting me know. It shall be nice to see him again.”
“Indeed…” He nodded. “Just don’t be too… upset when you do.”
Her heart started to pound as she entered the hotel. Her eyes scanned the area around them, but she saw no sign of the man she’d known. However, if Jacob was right, Anthony wasn’t the same man anymore. She did, however, spy her sister, Elaine. With her small child on her lap and her husband of three years sitting next to her, she gasped in happiness and handed over her daughter, then got up and rushed over to embrace Miranda.
“I’m so glad that you were able to make the journey and spend Christmas with us in Cumbria this year! Isn’t it magnificent?”
Miranda pulled back. “I daresay it is. Quite charming.”
“Hello, Miranda.”
Thatvoice. It slid over her skin like a soft caress. Whatever else had changed with Anthony, that had remained the same.
She saw Elaine look at her expectantly, as if waiting for her reaction, and then she shifted her eyes toward the speaker. She saw the smile first. It was the same, carefree one she recalled from all those years ago. “It’s been a long time,” he said softly.
She lifted her gaze and that was when everything stopped. The noise from the other occupants in the hotel faded away, as a buzzing sound filled her ears.
Thatface. It was so similar to the young man he had been in his youth, but time and maturity had hardened some of the planes of his face and sharpened his jaw. Even his collar-length, dark hair was threaded with bits of silver, likely evidence of the hard life he’d lived thus far.
But it was his eyes that captured her. Or more particularly his right one. What used to be a mossy green was now pure white, a scar going down the middle of his face that reached from his forehead to his chin. His appearance was drawing attention from the casual passerby, many giving him a wide berth as they whispered when they passed.
All she could think of was how much he must have suffered.
Miranda could feel the earth start to spin as her vision eclipsed around her. But the last thing she was going to do was faint in front of him and give him the wrong impression. He would think it was his deformity, when it was merely the overwhelming sensation of seeing him again.Alive, after all these years.
Nevertheless, it was Elaine who said, “Are you feeling well? You look rather pale.”
“I’m fine,” Miranda reassured her sister, although she sat down in the nearest chair she could find. “Perhaps some water?”
“Of course.” Elaine scurried off to procure the request, while Miranda struggled to regain her composure.
“I’m sorry.” Jacob entered her line of sight. “I should have thought you might be exhausted after your journey.”
It was the perfect excuse for Miranda to latch on to. “Yes. I daresay it was quite harrowing.” Although moments ago, she had just remarked how pleasant it was, thankfully, he didn’t mention it.
“Maybe it would be best if you lie down for a spell. We can all catch up at dinner this evening.”
“Yes. I think that would be best.” She sent her brother a gaze conveying silent gratitude, because he had long known she wasn’t a wilting wallflower. She was probably the strongest one out of all of them. She hadn’t shed a tear during their mother’s funeral, preferring to spill her grief in private.
To be fair, she had known her mother was struggling at the end of her life, whereas Miranda had no time to prepare for this unlikely reunion with the one man who had never left her thoughts for long.
She knew she was being a coward, but she couldn’t even look in Anthony’s direction as Elaine put an arm around her and led her to her suite of rooms. Once they were inside, and the servants at the hotel had left her trunks, Miranda sank down in one of the chairs by the cheery fireplace.
“He looks quite fearsome, doesn’t he?” Elaine said softly.
Miranda shook her head and exhaled heavily. “It has nothing to do with his scars, but everything to do with the man I have never forgotten.”
Elaine was silent for a time, and then she said, “Do you still love him? After all of these years?”
Miranda took a moment to consider her words. “What exactly is love, Ellie? If you mean, have I always thought of him in my quietest moments through the years? Then yes, I suppose I do. At the same time, I never got to experience the kind of love that you share with Daniel. I’ve never had anyone look at me with adoration in his eyes like he does you, and I haven’t done the same for Anthony since I was fifteen years old before he went off to war.”
Elaine’s expression was empathetic. “Perhaps this is the season for miracles.”
“If only that could be true, Ellie.” She glanced down at her lap. “If only.”
