***
Triana endured her brother’s stoic silence as he unceremoniously hauled her across the lawn and into their carriage, not bothering to pause in his stride long enough for it to be brought around. Her throat burned like acid at the carelessness of Gabriel’s words, although she wasn’t sure if she was more upset at him — or herself for wanting to believe in the fantasy she’d spun in her naiveté. Every time she thought he spoke the truth, his actions would prove otherwise and she would remember why she didn’t trust him, even if her heart yearned to do so.
When the countess joined them, she opened her mouth, intending to speak, but Triana feared she might very well burst into tears if she did.
Fortunately, Travell intervened and pinned Amelia to the seat with an outright glare. “Not a word, Mother.”
And for once, Lady Trenton complied.
The instant the barouche jerked to a halt in front of their stately brick townhouse, they all went inside without a single word, although the tension was so thick that it hung over them like a heavy cloak. The butler had the good sense not to remark on anyone’s silence, however odd, although he did stand by dutifully in case anyone might be in need of assistance. He needn’t have bothered, however, for Amelia instantly flounced off to her bedroom, while Travell half turned away from his sister and said, “A word, if you please,” before heading for his study.
Triana swallowed over the lump in her throat, but she slowly trailed behind him.
He instructed her to close the door, which she did, but she remained just inside the room, her hands clasped in front of her like a recalcitrant child. He stood with his back to her, tall and imposing near the solitary window that overlooked the street, the street lights outside casting his face in shadow. Not until the distinct sound of ice clinking on glass drifted to her ears, did Triana allow a single tear to escape. Her brother was never prone to consuming spirits like so many of his peers, unless something weighed heavily on his mind. She felt a rush of shame that she was the cause now.
Unable to bear the heavy silence any longer, she whispered, “Please say something, Travell.”
At first, she wasn’t sure if he’d heard her, but finally, he turned around. His face was expressionless, but when he spoke, his voice was clogged with emotion. “Why do you keep doing this to yourself, Triana?”
She jerked as if struck. “Travell, what happened tonight…”
“I’m not speaking of Gabriel,” he interrupted. “I’m referring how you’ve always seemed to go out of your way to gain the censure of society. You were careless tonight, and if I didn’t know better, I would think you wanted to get caught.”
Triana felt her irritation beginning to flare. “You sound just like Mother,” she returned bitterly.
“Do I?” Travell shot back. “Well, perhaps I finally agree with her, because I’m sure as hell having trouble understanding you right now!”
“That’s because you don’t care to know anything about me!” she retorted angrily, her hands clenching into fists, tears smarting in her eyes. “You stay in this room and barely associate with us anymore! Sometimes I wonder if you even love me at all.”
Travell instantly went still. After a time, he walked over to the bookcase and clutched one of the shelves so tightly that his knuckles turned white. Grim resignation was written in every line of his face as he stared at the floor, as if something in the polished wood might hold the key for what he was about to say. “I never meant to hurt you, Tri.” With a weary sigh, he pushed away. “I need to tell you something that’s been long overdue.”
He sat behind his massive, mahogany desk, and waved to the seat opposite him. Triana numbly walked over and sank down. She crossed her arms and waited for him to continue. “There’s something you don’t know about Gabriel, Triana.” A meaningful pause. “About me.”
He eyed her directly, but she didn’t say anything, just waited. He took a deep breath. “We both work for the Home Office — in secret. In fact, we’re working on a very delicate case right now.”
Triana blinked, not sure that she’d heard right. “You’re a…spy?” She whispered the word as if it was sacred.
Wordlessly, he nodded.
She sat back in the chair and gave this all a moment to sink in. “For how long?”
“Nearly five years for Gabriel and seven for me.”
She tried to keep her voice steady, but it wavered, nonetheless. “So you were enlisted in service before…” She cleared her throat and tried again. “Before…”
He knew what she was trying to say. “Yes. I had already made my commitment to the Crown before Father left. At that point, I couldn’t very well back out.”
She closed her eyes, feeling as if her lungs were closing in on her. It was getting increasingly difficult to take a deep breath. “So all this time, you’ve hidden this from me?”
“I was trying to protect you, Triana,” he attempted to explain. “You have to understand that the nature of the cases we deal with are very delicate. What I do is dangerous.” When she remained silent, he said softly, “Can’t you see that I couldn’t live with myself if I let something happen to you or Mother because of me?”
“So you would rather we just live in the dark?” she shot back, allowing her anger to override her pain. She’d been such a fool, because it all made perfect sense now. The worst part of it all being that the one person she’d trusted wholeheartedly had lied to her for years, and during the most tumultuous time of her life.
She had never felt more alone.
She rose slowly and said in a surprisingly calm voice, “I can’t… comprehend this right now. I need some time to… think.”
Tears welled in her eyes, blurring her vision.
