“Content is not happy.”
Bloody hell!
“It is preferable to miserable, which I am not, so there is no cause for you to worry.”
“Of course there is,” she argued. “I want to see you happy.”
He crossed his arms over his chest and studied her. “Why do you think that I am not?” he asked out of curiosity.
“Because when you arrived, you were just like your fatherafterhe lived in England.”
He would like to argue, but his mother was correct. It was no different from when he conducted business with those he had not met personally. It was important to establish that there was no time for triviality in business dealings and that he expected all matters to be completed as expeditiously as possible. After all, not only was he an earl, but he was respected because of the power of Trade Wynd, a lucrative import and export business rivaled only by the East India Company. Trade Wynd was influential politically but had no part of the military, which was preferrable as it allowed them more freedom to trade.
So, yes, he had been arrogant and expected Hallaway to report to him almost immediately. And that was when his intentions and expectations started to change.
“Such behavior is not a benefit to you or anyone around you. Do you really want to turn into the same strict taskmaster as your father with schedules to be kept, which meant that being early was on time and demanded exactness from everyone?”
No, he did. He just hadn’t truly realized just how rigid and unforgiving he had become. But he also knew that he had changed since that first day. Whether it was from being here or remembering a time when his family had been happy, being without responsibilities or Caroline, or everything combined, he did not know, but he was happy. Happy with his life, fortunate that he had come to Wyndview Farm,elated to have met Caroline and glad that he had forgiven his mother.
Sterling nearly sucked in a breath.
He had forgiven her and all the anger and animosity that he had carried for so many years was gone.
“The reason I have been sending you places is because I wanted you to remember how he was then. How we were. How you could be.”
“Mrs. Sutcliffe knew your plans, did she not?” he asked.
“Yes. She was reluctant to help because she believed she was needed here, but in the end she agreed.”
“So, you have been manipulating both of us.” Caroline thought she was assisting his mother, and him apparently, while his mother hoped he would find happiness and because she worried about Caroline.
“Yes, I have,” she admitted without guilt.
Sterling pinched the bridge of his nose and blew out a breath. He wanted to be angry with his mother for directing their lives but could not find it in himself. But, if he thanked her, it would only encourage her to keep on interfering and he wanted his relationship to continue on its own terms to see where it would end.
Besides, the harvest began tomorrow and neither one of them could be gone.
“Very well,” he finally said and turned to leave, not certain what else he could say to her, only to find Caroline standing in the doorway, concern in her brown eyes, and hand on her chest.
Sterling nodded to her and left the sitting room. They would talk later, when they were alone, though he was not yet certain that he was ready to reveal that he had fallen in love with her.
*
Caroline feared thatSterling would be angry when he learned.After he had asked her yesterday what his mother was up to and she confirmed that it was something, but would not tell him, she knew that he would demand answers but didn’t think that he would wait a day.
Except, he didn’t appear to be angry. Maybe frustrated but not upset as she would have expected after he had first arrived.
Caroline had no idea how he had been as a child, so she had no comparison. But he had become more approachable and less arrogant since his arrival. Further, he was an excellent lover.
She was also falling in love with him, which scared her. Would her heart mend after he was gone? It had taken time before she could think of Peter without hurting. How long would it take for her heart to recover from the loss of Sterling?
She closed her eyes and pushed her thoughts away. It would do no good to worry about a future when she had no intention of changing her present, knowing just how much she was risking her heart every time they were together.
Lady Wyndham smiled, quite pleased with herself, or maybe it was relief that she and her son had a conversation without anger. “I am certain that you want to retire early tonight since the harvest begins tomorrow.”
“I do,” she admitted, knowing that it was unlikely to happen if Sterling came to her room again tonight.
Lady Wyndham stood and let out a sigh of content.
