“I settled on my husband because it was expected. My life, from the moment I started to prepare for my first Season, has been duty. I came to Seaford to discover something for myself. I was not happy and suffered guilt for it, and even more so now. I have everything so why am I not content?”
“Having a privileged life does not always equate to happiness,” he offered. He’d met those in Society who were wealthy, had families, no scandal and lovely homes, but were miserable.
“I have been happy here.”
His heart began to pound.
“Not just being in Seaford but coming to know you and perhaps myself.” She stared into his eyes. “I am not certain that I even want to return to London. I may not want to leave here at all.”
His life was in London and there was little he could do…unless he remained to be the solicitor for the good people of Seaford. The thought had occurred to him on more occasions than one. But that did not mean that he and Lavinia would ever be anything more than friends and possibly former lovers if he was even given the opportunity, because they could never be more.
Oddly, he had never pondered the more and assumed he’d remain a bachelor. Unfortunately, the one woman who could tempt him to the altar was out of reach.
“I have enjoyed my holiday as well, Lavinia.”
They continued down the beach and Lavinia stopped at the steps that led up to her cottage. Your sisters have married and married well,” she said after a moment.
Demetrius had wondered when she would ask.
“Their husbands…do they know?”
“They knew before the vows were ever exchanged because my sisters insisted upon it so that their husbands were given the opportunity to cry off due to the circumstances of their birth.”
Lavinia smiled. “They loved and that was all that mattered.”
“It was.”
She blew out a sigh and stared up the steps. “Would you like to come inside?”
As much as he wished to do so, Demetrius would not.
“You have much to think on, Lavinia.” He lifted her hand and placed a kiss upon the back. “I will speak with you at dinner.”
After she was inside, he turned and walked to his cottage and hoped that once Lavinia had been given a chance to think about all he had said that she did not reject him, yet Demetrius anticipated that she would.
Chapter
Fifteen
She had been shocked by the revelations earlier, but they had not changed how Lavinia viewed Demetrius.
To think that he came from such humble beginnings. Not simply humble but destitute. Had Vicar Grant not rescued them, Demetrius could have ended up in Newgate, a thief, cutthroat, executed or transported.
Well, he had been a pickpocket, so Demetrius had already been well on the way to a life of crime, but not without good reason.
And for the girls…
She did not even want to think about what may have become of them.
There was no shame in his family circumstance, though she knew that Society would not agree with her. However, the one person who should be ashamed of himself was the former Marquess of Wingate—to turn his daughter out like that …well, it was quite disconcerting.
Oh, she understood that bastards were often denied, hidden away or rejected, but at least the first five children were legitimate regardless of the fact that their father had been a stable hand.
That was the world that she had been born into and the reason she had never brought shame to her own family, and that she had made certain that her actions were always above reproach, as well as their reputation, all so her family was protected. She also did not want them to be gossiped about as she had witnessed herself what became of a family ruined in the eyes of the ton.
Except, what did such earn her, besides the approval of a Society who would reject Demetrius and his siblings without even attempting to learn their names, based on their parentage and some being born on the wrong side of the blanket?
Did she really wish to be part of a Society that judged all men and women on their title and wealth, and nothing else?
