“I had not realized a child was the reason,” he said.
“It is a secret, but I do not think it made a difference other than rush the inevitable.” She chuckled. “But I digress from what I intended to tell you.”
“What would that be?”
“When Octavia came to London last spring, she had one intention and one intention only.”
“What was that?”
“To experience passion.”
His eyes widened for just a moment and then Demetrius hitched a brow as if intrigued.
“She was going to find a lover for the Season, experience a grand passion, and that was all. I thought she was mad, of course. I could not understand why anyone would seek out intimacies if they did not have to…well…out of duty.” Lavinia shook her head and took another sip of the brandy. “I firmly believed that passion was a myth created by poets, and perhaps it is.”
“I can assure you that it is not.”
She snorted. “You are a man. A rake. Of course you are going to claim such.”
He arched a brow and smirked. “I will try not to take offense.”
“I could not help but wonder if she was correct, and thought perhaps…”
His eyes darkened as he studied her. “That you might take a lover to see if it was a truth, or simply a myth.”
“Yes,” she answered. “I have considered that I may do as she did next spring and find a rake to see if any of it is true.” There, she had said it. She came out and admitted to what she wanted without asking, leaving the option to Demetrius to offer. If he did not, then she would not suffer the embarrassment of being rejected. Lavinia blew out a sigh then took a sip of her brandy. “Of course, I would insist on discretion as I do have younger sisters and their chances of a happy future cannot be ruined.”
He studied her for the longest time and Lavinia began to fear that she had confessed too much. What would he think of her now?
“Why wait until spring?”
Her heart started pounding. Would he now seduce her?
He wanted to offer himself in that moment but proceeded with caution.
Was Lavinia simply too afraid to come out and ask him?
Or, she wanted a lover, but not him?
In the past, it had been so easy to tell when a woman wished for intimacy, but Lavinia was not like any woman of his acquaintance and Demetrius feared that he would make a misstep, and she would reject him.
She was thinking of a lover in the future, but did she have someone else in mind?
No! She said that she would find a rake, which she also believed him to be.
“Why the spring and not now?”
“I had not counted on encountering a rake in Seaford.” The corner of her lip tipped.
“I, too, would enjoy a lover, but did not expect to find one in Seaford either.”
She simply nodded.
“The difficulty is that for me to experience passion, I must know a person very well.”
Lavinia bit the corner of her lip and he was certain that she had no idea how to respond.
“You will not be here long enough to come to know someone well,” she finally said.
