“Thank you.” Eve clutched the pounds in a tight fist, not that Henry could blame her. She’d been near starving when she and her brother first arrived here. She probably hadn’t seen so much money in months.
A most beautiful and intriguing woman and Mr. Francis Hilliard wasn’t the only one quite taken with her. Not a day passed that he didn’t want to forget everything, her studies, his plans, and take her in his arms and kiss her quite thoroughly.
That would never do of course, and despite his reputation as being one of the Devils of Dalston, Henry would not compromise her.
Perhaps it would be better if Eve was living with his mother, and once the ball was over, it was likely that Henry might put her in his mother’s care so that he did not give into temptation to taste her lips.
“Kilsyth?”
He blinked and looked to Pickmore.
“I’ve never known you to woolgather,” his friend laughed. “I asked you twice if you’d like a brandy, but you stared off into space.
“My apologies.” Eve was now beginning to affect his mind at the most inopportune times. “Yes. Please.”
“If you don’t mind, Lord Kilsyth, I’d like to rest now.”
Henry frowned. Eve did not rest. At least she hadn’t since she’d come to his home. “Is all well, Miss Doyle?”
“I’m simply tired is all,” she explained. “We’ve studied day in and out since I arrived and today was rather trying.”
“Trying? You weren’t even forced to participate in inane conversations?”
Her nostrils flared and lips pursed for a moment. “Ye try spendin’ a day with others and not speakin’ a word. Holdin’ me tongue and rememberin’ not ta speak was tryin’ and frankly has brought on a headache.”
He supposed that would be difficult. Though he often sat without speaking a word. “You did not enjoy the races? It’s what you bargained for?” Henry argued.
Pain flashed in her eyes before she turned away. “It wasn’t as I remembered.”
What the bloody hell did that mean? “Take your rest, Miss Doyle. We’ll continue your lessons tomorrow.”
Henry’s gut tightened as he watched her glide from the room. It was all he could do not to go after her and demand what was really at issue. It wasn’t just a headache but something more, yet he couldn’t fathom why she’d sunk into a depressive state. And what the blazes did she mean that it wasn’t like before.
Bloody hell! Eve was upset and he had no idea why. And not just upset, but sad. Had this all been too much for her? He could be rather demanding in his teachings, but she’d not complained.
He paused and turned back to the room, accepted the glass of brandy from Pickmore and wandered to his desk.
She had complained, but he’d gotten around her. Of course it was easy since he’d dangled her necklace as a prize to be won. He’d give her that bloody necklace now if he thought it would return a smile to those bow lips, but Henry had a sinking suspicion that not even that would bring light to her eyes and he was at a loss as to understand what the blazes was wrong with her.
* * *
Eve fought the tears until she gained her chamber. Once the door was closed, she threw herself on the bed and finally allowed herself to cry, which quickly turned into sobs, as she’d been fighting the emotions all afternoon. They weren’t because she had to remain silent, or that she suffered from a very real headache, but for her losses.
It was her father who had taken her to Ascot that one time, and oh how she had enjoyed watching their horses race. That day had been nearly perfect and she couldn’t wait to return. Except, the next year he was gone. Within a few years,everythingwas gone.
What she hadn’t expected was for today to turn out to be so difficult. She’d been looking so forward to a day at Ascot but when the memories flooded her of an earlier, happier time, she’d been grateful that she didn’t have to speak, as it took everything she possessed not to cry as loneliness engulfed her. Brendan was lost to her and maybe even to himself and Cait was too far away to visit.
Her sister may have a position teaching, but how often was she lonely? Did she miss Eve as much as Eve missed her? Did she miss their home in Ireland—miss what once was? Or, had Cait managed to make new friends and find happiness on her own?
If possible, Eve would give up now and leave Kilsyth’s home and go to Cornwall. Except, she’d made a promise that she’d remain for the month, learn all of his lessons, and in the end the necklace would be hers. Only then would Eve be able to walk out the door and make her own way.
At least she now had sixty pounds to make the journey easier and if she were frugal, perhaps she could make it last until she found a position.
Eve had told Kilsyth that she wished to be a governess, but who would hire her without experience or references? She couldn’t go back to the theatre either. Eve wanted more for herself and one day thought there would be. Oh the grand dreams she had when she was younger were only dust now and she must form other dreams.
Maybe she could become a teacher like Cait. Maybe they could work at the same school, then they’d never be parted. They could grow old together, if neither of them married, of course.
Marriage, while it offered security, Eve did not see herself becoming a wife. Of course, she’d never been granted the opportunity to be courted because by the time she came of age, the family was already destitute and the neighboring bachelors in Cork wanted nothing to do with her brother, or their family, and had assumed, as everyone else, that there’d be no dowry. Once they came to England, so Brendan could escape the creditors, she’d been too busy working so that they could pay rent and put food on the table. Besides, she didn’t want to be the wife of someone as poor as she. Though if she’d found love, it wouldn’t have mattered, and she would have worked alongside her husband, but she’d not put herself in the same situation just so she’d have the security of a home and husband.
