“That sounds serious. As bad as mine?”
“Worse.”
Newt shot him a look. “Worse? Christ. Right.”
They cleared up, put a stopper in the wine bottle and settled on the couch. River took hold of Newt’s hand. He hoped he had the words to explain this. Maybe it would be easier to let Newt read about them. “Look up Shaw family, Kent. Tra-tragedy. Read. Too much for me to ex…explain.”
“I assumed there was some issue because you’ve never mentioned them.”
River moved closer so he could see what Newt was looking at.
“That.” River pointed to a post that had a picture of him and his parents and his two younger sisters. His heart twisted in his chest. Emily and Lottie stood either side of their mum. River, or Tomas as he was then, stood next to his father. They were all smiling. The photo had been taken a month before the world ended.
Newt sucked in a breath, put his phone down and clutched River’s hand as he looked at him, eyes wide and horrified. “Oh my God. He killed everyone?”
“Dad was short of money… Mum a…spender.” River gave a choked laugh. “On us. On him. On her. Nice house. Nice holidays… Private school. He borrowed. Took out…another mortgage. Borrowed more. Things were very bad. He didn’t tell us.”
Newt squeezed his fingers.
“That day…pan…pancakes for breakfast.” He began to breathe more heavily. “I moaned about…homework. Lottie and Em…shopping with Mum. Dad took me to gol…golf place. Happy.” He fought back tears.
“After we went to bed, everything changed. He s…str…strangled my sisters while they were sleeping. I heard a noise. Came out of my room and saw him… Ran to Mum… She told me…hi…hide on the roof and stay there. She helped me up. Closed the window. I heard her shouting. Screaming.” He swallowed hard. “Then I heard a shot. No more noise. Until he came looking for me.”
“Oh shit.”
“Didn’t move… Scared. Nearly fell. I could hear him calling and calling. I waited. He…came outside and saw me. I tried to climb higher and…he shot at me. Twice. Missed. I hid behind the chim…ney.” He let out a shuddering breath. “He came upstairs and climbed out after me…s…slipped on the tiles and s…slid off the roof.”
“Fucking hell, River. That’s awful.”
“Police came. Fireman got me down. Didn’t want to let go of …chimney. He kept telling me I was okay. Wasn’t.”
“Did you have any other family?”
“No one. Max had seen me in…a play at s…school. Two weeks before… Gave me his…card. Police called him. He came so fast. Took me to his house. Cared for me.”
“He wanted you to sign with him?”
“Yes, but I didn’t have to. Max said…he’d help me go to…uni.”
“You said no?”
“I said no.”
“Max offered you the chance of another life, unconnected to the one you had. A new name, a new start. Your past gone.”
River nodded. “To not be the boy whose father sl…sl…killed his family… Max looked after me. No one knowsabout my past… Only Max. And you now. So… should I forgive my father?”
“Was he a good father?”
“Yes.” River sagged against him. “He was good.” Until he wasn’t.
“He must have been mentally ill. He probably thought he was saving the family the shame of him having no money and needing to sell your home, taking all three of you out of school, no more lovely holidays. Protecting you from a future he hadn’t been able to face for himself or for you. It’s sad.”
“Would you forgive?”
Newt chewed his lip. “He wasn’t thinking straight, but he killed your mother and your sisters in a horrible way and tried to kill you. There were other things he could have done, other paths he could have taken and he chose the wrong one. I’d find it hard to forgive him. He could have killed himself and let you all live. Except you’d have hated him for a different reason then and probably blamed yourself for not seeing something coming.”
“Maybe.”
