When River lay down and looked up, he understood why they were out there. The sky was inky black, no light-pollution, and the stars were bright. He swallowed hard. When Newt came back, he arranged two blankets over River, then lay on the lounger next to him with a blanket for himself.
“Isn’t it amazing?” The awe in Newt’s voice, brought a lump to River’s throat.
It was amazing. He couldn’t remember when he’d last looked up into a night sky and marvelled at the stars.
“I was going to do this on my own. I wasn’t sure I’d manage to persuade you, but I’m glad you’re with me. I don’t know the names of many of the constellations, but I looked up some of them. We’re out here for more than the stars, though. Keep looking to the left. We’re going to see something incredible in a few minutes.”
A shooting star? Plane?
“No, not that plane, though I guess planes are pretty incredible machines. I’ve never been on one.”
What?River glanced at him.
“Keep looking up. Ah, that’s it. There.” He pointed. “Look! Can you see?”
A bright light moved at speed across the sky.
“Not a UFO but the International Space Station.”
Wow.
“Seven astronauts up there. 250 miles above us.Travelling at around 17,500 miles per hour. Isn’t that crazy? They circle the world in ninety minutes so they see the sun rise and set sixteen times a day. I looked all that up. Apparently, it needs to go at that speed so it balances the pull of Earth’s gravity and doesn’t fall out of the sky.”
It seemed scary that was all that was keeping it up there.
“I was never interested in physics at school but I found myself wanting to read more and more about the ISS. I mean, do the astronauts feel the speed they’re going? The answer, sorry if you already know, is that they don’t because they’re travelling at the same speed as the space station. It’s like being in a car or a train. I should have thought of that. Would you go up into space if you got the chance?”
Newt looked at him and River shook his head.
“Me neither. I’m not that brave. I’d like to see Earth from up there but I wouldn’t like the journey, and I definitely wouldn’t want to stay up there. I’ll shut up now so we can just drink it all in.”
They lay side by side, not touching, just looking up at the stars and River felt the kind of peace come over him that he’d not felt for a long time. It didn’t make his personal problems seem smaller but it did encourage him to think about something other than himself for a while.
Finally, the bright moving dot passed out of sight.
“I don’t know if you know anything about the stars. I knew a bit before tonight. Now I know a bit more.” He chuckled. “Google is addictive. We can only see around 9,000 stars without a telescope, yet there are a trillion stars in the Milky Way alone. The brightest star in the night sky is Sirius. Over eight light years away so we’re seeing it as it was over eight years in the past. Blows my mind. It’s twice the mass of our sun and twenty-five times brighter. Have you died ofboredom yet?”
River wished he could tell him this was the most interested he’d been in anything for months.
They lay there a little longer and just as River was beginning to feel cold, Newt pushed off his blanket and stood up.
“We better go in before we start to freeze.”
He took off River’s blankets and folded them neatly.
“I’ll bring the cushions. You go back inside.”
River picked up two cushions.
“Great! Thank you.”
River struggled with them but he wanted to prove he wasn’t helpless.Just wordless.
He went up to bed after Newt came back into the kitchen. River didn’t feel tired, but being with Newt reminded him too much of what he’d lost. He didn’t want to practise speaking. For the first time in a long while, he wanted to practise something else. He hadn’t managed to maintain his erection earlier, but he wanted to try again.
River liked wanking.Hadliked it. Considered himself somewhat of an expert in it. But since his fall, he’d not managed to make himself come. Or even get fully hard really. He’d suspected it had everything to do with his traumatic brain injury. Depression and anxiety weren’t the right mindset for bringing himself off. His libido was scarily low. Even if he had managed to get his dick to show some interest, it never lasted long, and it scared him from trying again because the disappointment was crushing.
But now Newt was here, River felt different. He shouldn’t have. He was supposed to act straight. He had a girlfriend—who he’d never touched. Well, they’d kissed, held hands, cuddled in public but that was all. River knew what hewas. Knew what he wanted. Maybe thinking about Newt while he lay in bed would make the difference.
