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Not since last night and the ‘Jake naked boobs’ mistake, but I was going to have to when I post the Davis and Cece picture anyway. “Gimme a sec.”

She pours me a Cuervo as I redownload the app. My stomach gives an annoying flutter as I enter my password. I ignore my loaded inbox and head straight for the Stabbies account.

“Hey! We’re up three thousand followers! Is that what you meant?”

“No. I mean, that’s amazing, but I meant Will Sharpe commented on my beer picture! He said the bar looks awesome!”

Cece falling for Davis was always a long shot, but this is a real kick in the guts. I reach for my phone to check said beer picture. “A bot-level comment from a dweeb? Huzzah!”

Cece gasps. “How can you even say that? It proves Will’s interested in my business!”

I love Cece too much to respond,No, darling, it proves he radiates massive‘I think being a landlord is a real job’energy. Though viewing Will Sharpe’s actual comment only further validates my theory:

Bar looks pretty good. Congrats, Cee.

Pretty good? Shut the fuck up, Will. You sell third-rate cars for a living. And you’re a nutsack.

I set down my phone and watch Cece stack the industrial dishwasher, her cheeks pink and eyes dreamy. I half expect cartoon bluebirds to fly through the window and start helping.

“Cecelia,” I say after a healthy swallow of tequila. “What do you actually like about Will Sharpe?”

“What do you mean?”

“Exactly what I said. Why him? Even after all this time? Why now?”

Her face goes soft. “Oh, he’s so sweet and funny, and he loves nature.”

I burst out laughing. “You hate nature.”

“I do not! I love the outdoors!”

“Wine tours don’t count, my guy.”

Cece isn’t listening. She’s gazing into the middle distance like she’s inThe Sound of Music.

“I know exactly when I fell for Will. Back at school,” she breathes. “I just never told you because… well… you didn’t know Will like I do.”

And hopefully I never have to, because he’s about to unexpectedly choke on a chicken wing and die.Still, I want to hear this Will Sharpe story more than I want to insult the prick. “So, what happened?”

She fidgets with a dishcloth, twisting it around her fingers. “Do you really want to know?”

“Of course.” Maybe she found out Will’s hung like a donkey or something that makes sense…

“So, I was fourteen. It was before you came to school and my Mum and Dad were away, so Tristan?—”

Long time no see, Addy. How you doing?

“—threw a party at our house, and all the popular people were hanging out downstairs, but Tristan?—”

Long time no see, Addy. HOW YOU DOING?

“—told me I hadto stay in my room and not get in the way. I did, but eventually I was so hungry, and went downstairs, and everyone was smoking weed under the stove fan and Tristan?—”

I miss seeing you around Pukekohe. How’s the flute going?

“—made fun of me. I forget what he said, something about me being a loser. Anyway, I ran into the hall crying and smacked right into Will.”

“Did you draw blood?”