“Fuuuuck, I’m so fucking sorry. You musta thought I was such a cunt…”
“Yeah! You were a right bastard!” Sal smacked him a third time for good measure. “If Byron ever found out you said that…”
“He’d have killed me, and I’d have deserved it.”
“You sure would have, you S-tier creepo!”
“I dunno what that means, but I get the picture.” Curtis pressed the back of his hand to his still-burning face. “I am seriously so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
His fingers were massive, twisted in a way Sal had only seen on guys who played football. The sizzle of attraction that ran through them was as unexpected as it was scary. Without making the conscious decision to do so, Sal found themselves moving closer to Curtis Ingram, looking up into his face like theywere a little, lost puppy. “At least you feel bad. Plenty of guys who bullied me didn’t.”
Curtis blinked down at her, and his face somehow grew redder. “I dunno how to say this without sounding like I’m making excuses, but, uh, I was into you back then.”
“Really?”
“Oh yeah. Massive crush.”
He looked away, bashful as a baby lamb, and heat bloomed through Sal’s middle like a tropical flower. Despite everything, ‘meeting someone hot and banging it out’ might actually be happening. With an ex-bully no less. Because Sal loved subby dudes who knew how to take a beating, and despite Curtis Ingram’s height and history of mad cuntery, he was one hundred percent giving that vibe. They smiled up at their brother’s old friend, subtly tucking their elbows in tight to create maximum titty tunnel. “I can’t believe you were only mean to me because you were pulling my pigtails...”
“Sorry,” Curtis said again. “I was a stupid teenager, but I still shouldn’t have done that.”
“I can handle a little rough stuff. But how am I supposed to know you’re being honest about having feelings for baby-Sal, Curtis Ingram?”
He huffed out a laugh. “Hot little thing who doesn’t take shit from anyone? What’s not to love?”
It occurred to Sal that he hadn’t used female pronouns once, and they felt a rush of optimism. If Curtis was this hot and they didn’t have to haveThe Conversation,this was shaping up to be the best night they’d had in a long time.
“So, my massive tits didn’t factor into your mean crush at all?” Sal teased.
His face flushed again, and Sal would have bet every dollar to their name—around twenty or so—that they were holding off staring directly at their rack by a thread.
“Sorry,” he said, for what felt like the dozenth time. “I know I probably came off like some cocky asshole, but it was all a front. I had no idea how to talk to girls. Still don’t, as you can probably tell.”
Shiiiiiit.
The disappointment Sal felt must have shown on their face, because Curtis frowned. “What’s up?”
This was the problem with meeting someone in person—no bios to list pronouns in. Sal often wondered if they should invest in a they/them face tattoo. They opened their mouth to correct him, and nothing came out.
What the fuck?Sal thought.I do this every day. Why is this so fucking hard?
“Sal? You ‘right?”
They tore their gaze from Curtis Ingram’s bright blue eyes and summoned up all their non-binary courage. “It’s fine…” they began. “But I’m not… I don’t… I’m not a girl.”
Curtis’s forehead scrunched. “Sorry?”
His confusion was understandable. It was one of the sloppiest comeouts Sal had ever executed. “I mean, I don’t identify as a girl anymore. I’m non-binary. One of those they/thems, ya know?”
“Non-binary?”
He said it like it was French or something. Like he had no idea how to use the phrase properly. But he wasn’t walking away, and he wasn’t being a dick. Again, Sal fought back a wave of insecurity that shocked them. They were out to everyone; at home, at dancing, at work. Everyone who taught at Sunshine Primary called them ‘them’, including the kids. How was giving this spiel to one hot dude rocking their shit so hard?
“Yeah, I’m not really a man or a woman,” Sal forced themselves to say. “It’s, like… somewhere outside of all that.”
They watched Curtis digest the news, braced for annoyance or outright hostility, but he just nodded, his forehead still scrunched like he was trying to solve a tricky math problem. “Okay, so you’re not a girl, and you’re not a guy, you’re… in between?”
“Not really. It’s hard to explain, but I sometimes feel like both or neither. It’s fluid, you know? Not just one thing. It's more like, whatever feels right in the moment. Not having to define myself by what I’mnot.”
