“I said ‘suck.’”
Whimpering, I close my lips around the barrel tasting the now familiar oil and metal. I move back and forth, tears leaking from my eyes. I feel a hot surge of unreality and know I’m going to pass out. Maybe Adriano knows it too because he fists my hair. “Suck harder. Tight and fast.”
It isn’t like last time. Last time I was in a chair with Adriano above me. He was shoving the gun into my mouth while I tried to keep my teeth out of the way. It was violent. Forced. Almost staged. This is different. I’m on my knees and Adriano’s pumping the gun slowly, working it in and out of my mouth. It feels more like doingthatthan sucking a gun. My eyes lock on his canvas pants. The front is thick and distorted. He has a… but he’s making me suck his gun instead. Doc was right. He is a big freak. I sputter a laugh against the barrel. Adriano’s hand tightens in my hair. “Something funny?”
My insides swoop. I suck the gun deeper making myself gag.
He smiles, his lips twisting to reveal his gold tooth. “Use your tongue on the underside.”
I flick my tongue against the metal and his smile grows wider. “Good girl.”
How does he know? He can’t feel it. Or maybe he can. Maybe he’s some kind of cyborg.
He moves his free hand from my head and rubs a palm across his zipper. I imagine him hard and thick as a python and an unwelcome burr goes through me like static.
Some girls like that, Doc whispers in my mind.Some girls want to be fucked by a big freak.
But not me. I can’t want that. Because if I did want to sleep with Adriano, it would mean I’m broken inside. A shattered doll.
He grips my chin through the bars. “I want you gone, little whore.”
I choke, accidentally biting down on the gun. Adriano glares at me. “Do better.”
I open my mouth wide and try to suck softly.
“That’s it.” He smooths a hand through my sweaty hair. “Did you already know I want to kill you?”
Yes. I knew it when he first pushed Eli’s gun into my throat. The hatred in his eyes said he was dying to shoot me and pile my body on top of Kurt’s.
“All those times you thought I was watching you dance, I was wishing I could choke you to death.”
I sputter. Spit spills from my lips, down my chin.
Adriano sneers. “You’re drooling on yourself like a toothless old woman.”
I tighten my lips around the barrel and try to swallow the spit but more dribbles out and I feel it reach my chest.
“You’re a disgusting little girl, aren’t you?”
I nod, tears leaking from my eyes.
He jerks his head at the basement door. “I’ve watched you manipulate them. Try to win them over with your crying and pretty smiles. You’re pathetic.”
The gun goes deeper, and I choke.
Adriano’s gold tooth flashes at me. “Keep going.”
My jaw aches, but I suck faster, wanting to be good. To please him. It occurs to me that if he really was forcing himself into my mouth, I’d act the same way. A bolt of sick heat goes through me. Do I wish it was his cock? Do I want him to want me even as he does this?
Adriano’s hand moves from my hair to my neck, his fingers locking around my throat. “If you try blowing Bobby, or Eli or Doc, if you try and get what you want out of them by being a little whore, I’ll kill you before their cum is halfway down your throat.”
Light pops in front of my eyes but still, I keep sucking.
“Got that?”
I moan around the barrel.
“The fuck was that?”
