I lean into his touch, allowing him to comfort me. “I was so scared, I thought I lost him too.”
“I’m so sorry, I didn’t want to scare you, but I knew you’d sic Steph and Claire on me if I didn’t call you.” We both chuckle. “They said someone can ride in the back with him. Do you want to go?”
Do I?
Blair pushes me away when I don’t answer, holding my face in both hands and forcing me to look him in the eyes. “I don’t want to pressure you, but you should go. I can take my car and meet you guys there. I need a second to calm down before I rip him a new asshole for driving in this weather in the first place.”
Nodding, I push my wet hair out of my face. “Why were you both out here anyway?”
“I-“ he blinks a couple times, “I don’t know, actually. Hesaid he needed to clear his head, we all tried to tell him it wasn’t safe, but he wouldn’t listen, so I hopped in my car to make sure nothing happened.”
The second I know he’s safe, I’m going to kick his ass for scaring the living shit out of me.
Nothing, not even a bad headspace, is worth risking your life.
What if that was the whole point though?
“We’re heading out,” one of the paramedics yells, holding the door open. “Are one of you coming with us?”
Blair and I look at each other for a second.
“Seriously, go,” he urges.
I run towards the ambulance, climbing in before they shut the door behind me. Johnny is strapped into the gurney, eyes clamped shut.
“You didn’t have to almost get yourself killed to get my attention you know,” I tell him, trying to make light of the situation.
His eyes fly open, “Pixie?”
“I’m here,” I sit down and grab his hand.
It’s not until I’m physically holding him that it hits me, he’s okay.
Johnny Davis didn’t die tonight.
thirty-one
DAVIS
The soft beeping of the monitor next to me breaks up the heavy silence in the room. They took me to get a head CT, and it confirmed that I have a minor concussion.
I’m lucky that I didn’t break any bones, or have worse injuries, considering how bad my car looked.
Sasha sits on the chair beside my bed, changed into fresh clothes that Blair dropped off for her. Her hair is damp from the rain, and her eyes look tired, but she came here anyway.
I can’t believe she drove.
“Did you go out because you were trying to hurt yourself?” She asks, tilting her head to the side.
There’s no way around this conversation, no way around telling her the truth. I can’t lie to her, I don’t want to lie to her.
“No. I was in my head about what’s happening between us, and I didn’t know what to do,” I tell her. “I needed to getout of the house, I needed to clear my head and figure out how to fix this mess I created.”
My whole body aches, from both the injuries and the pain I’ve felt since I walked out of her house that day.
It was dumb to go out into that storm, but I didn’t know what else to do. I needed to figure out a plan, and staring at my ceiling wasn’t working.
She releases a pained breath, “I don’t know what I would have done if you-“
