“Don’t call me that.”
“Whatever you say,sweet cheeks.”
“Don’t call me sweet cheeks either” she snaps.
“Well then what can I call you?”
She ponders it for a moment, “Goddess, Queen, best human being on this planet…”
“Yeah, as fucking if” he says, rolling his eyes.
Steph pulls out her phone, “okay get into the frame, I want a picture of you guys.”
Blair jumps into Lucas’s arms and poses by giving him a kiss on the cheek, August sticks his tongue out and holds bunny ears behind Miller's head. Miller looks at August out of the corner of his eye and flips him the middle finger. Davis throws me over his shoulder and slaps his hand on my ass, angling himself so you can see my face in the picture. I smile up at him while I place both my hands on his ass.
Steph snaps the photo and smiles down at her phone, “this one’s a keeper for sure.”
twenty
CLAIRE
This is it, the first competition of the season. I’m gonna do great, I know this routine like the back of my hand.
My hair sits in a bun on the top of my head, white crystal flowers bloom from the edges, silver glitter is dusted over my bare skin, and I have tears of gold streaming from my eyes.
Crystal and Sharron did an amazing job, when I looked in the mirror I barely recognized myself. Between the little details, the shiny silver dress dripping with crystals and baby blue blending in from the seams, I look like a goddess.
I’m by the doors to the ice, waiting for my name to be announced before I go on to perform. My stomach twists and I have to keep myself from puking everywhere, the nerves are getting to me.
When I’m finally called, I head to centre ice, hoping to god that I don’t make a fool of myself right now. The music starts and I move, feeling everything I felt the first day I choreographed it with my coaches.
I forget that I’m skating, and become consumed by my thoughts. Moving wherever my body takes me, while I feel my heart breaking in two.
This is one of my more emotional routines, it’s deep and dark, every twisted thought I’ve ever had put is on display for the world to see. It’s my soul placed on a silver platter.
Part of the reason why I’m a champion skater is because I don’t just skate, I put everything into the routines I do. I use this sport as a way to disconnect from reality, I use it to filter all my emotions. I use skating as a way to cope, when everything else in my life falls to pieces, I’ve always had this to fall back on. It’s been consistent, it’s been safe.
I want to cry, want to break down and let go. I hate the way I felt when I made this, I hate how dark my life was when I first strung together this series of moves. I hate that no matter how happy I am, there is always something new to ruin it. I haveneverbeen as happy as I am with my new friends, they bring out the best in me.
I want them to see the real me, and I can’t do that if I’m not completely honest with them. I guess the final decision has been made, I’m telling them everything tonight. They deserve to know.
The music fades away and I come to a stop on the ice. The crowd cheers and I take a bow.
* * *
“Hey Angel, what’s up?” Chris asks me, his face filling my screen.
I sit in my car, twisting my hands nervously around the wheel, “are you going to be home tonight?” I ask.
“I think so-”
The phone is being jostled and the image of my brother goes blurry before his best friend pops up on the screen.
“Claire!” Sam screams into the phone.
“Sam, you don’t need to yell. I can hear you perfectly fine.”
“Oops, sorry” he shrugs. “Anyway, how’s my favourite little sister?”
