The dark held fragmentsof memory like broken glass.Kai floated in and out of it, flashes stabbing through—Hogan’s voice muttering against his ear, cursing and pleading, demanding he breathe, he live.The sound of machines he half recognized, monitors that beeped at him as if to measure his stubbornness.Hands steady on his skin, holding him down when pain and fever had made him thrash.Hogan spooning soup into his mouth, grumbling about how a man could fight cartels but couldn’t handle a bowl of broth without help.
Each memory burned quickly and then went under, leaving him drifting until the next one surfaced.Hogan’s breath rough as he said, “Not here, not like this.”Hogan swearing at someone over a line, snapping at whoever was on the other end of the line.Hogan whispering promises he wasn’t supposed to make.“Stay with me.Stay.”
Hogan never once called him Rip.Not once.That name, that history, was buried beneath the amnesia that Hogan suffered after Chechnya.To Hogan, he was just Kai—broken, bleeding, stubborn—but Kai knew how close he’d come to giving it away.
Then—light.Real light.Morning crept across him soft and golden, a warmth he hadn’t expected to wake to.Kai blinked hard, the lids heavy, and found himself lying on a mattress that smelled faintly of bleach and Hogan’s soap.A blanket was tucked tight around him.His body pulled when he shifted, stitches or staples tugging fire at his side.He hissed, sucking in air.
Beside him, someone stirred.He turned his head to look.
Hogan.
The man came awake instantly, even in sleep sharp-edged.His blue eyes locked on Kai across the narrow space of pillows.Messy hair, scruff roughening his jaw, and a crease pressed into his cheek from where he’d lain.He looked exhausted.Yet, he still looked like home.Kai guessed he probably always would.
Kai’s throat scratched.“How long?”
Hogan rubbed at his eyes once, then fixed him with that steady gaze.“Week.We have checked into an RV park.I’ve been playing nurse.Before you ask—yes, you’re alive.Yes, you stink.And yes, I’ve seen you naked.Try not to get too excited.”
Kai coughed a laugh that tugged at his side.“Christ, Ace.You always know how to make a man feel special.”
“You’re special, all right,” Hogan muttered.He reached for the bottle of water by the bed and pressed it into Kai’s hand.“Special kind of pain in my ass.”
Kai sipped, the cool liquid burning down his dry throat.He set it back, then let his gaze linger on Hogan.Every line of him.The weight of him here, beside him.Sarcasm aside, Hogan had sat vigil.Hogan had kept him tethered to life.
“Did you really—” Kai’s voice dropped.“Soup?”
Hogan’s mouth curved just enough.“Fed you like the helpless baby you were.You’re welcome.”
Kai smirked, then winced again at the pull in his side.He lay back, closing his eyes briefly.“Guess that means I owe you.”
“Damn right it does,” Hogan said.He adjusted the pillow behind him, stretching out but keeping his gaze fixed on Kai.“And don’t think I won’t collect.”
They lay like that for a long beat, just watching.Breathing.The world outside the van quiet, muted by morning, but there were sounds of people moving about the park.
Kai swallowed, throat thick.He’d faced death enough times to know what it looked like.This time, Hogan had pulled him back from it with sheer force of will.He felt the truth of it pressing down on him, heavy and strange.
“So,” Hogan said finally, voice low.“I have a shitload of questions.”
“No doubt you do,” Kai responded.
Hogan nodded.“Even have them written down in a list so I don’t forget any of them.I figure the best way to tackle them is in chronological order.”
Kai’s heartbeat raced.Had Hogan remembered him?Had he finally remembered everything they were, and could be in the future together?If he knew, then—
“So, let’s start at the beginning.You are going to tell me why you helped the colonel when Eli was taken.”
The words landed like a blade on stone.Nope, he hadn’t remembered shit.And without even knowing it, he had asked Kai the easiest question of them all to answer.
Kai licked his lips, the weight of memory pressing in.“That’s ...certainly a place to start, I guess.”
“Good,” Hogan said, settling in closer, his tone equal parts challenge and promise.“Whenever you’re ready.”
Kai met his stare across the pillows, his chest tight and aching.“You think I can get a shower and use the bathroom first?”
An adorable sweep of red rose in Hogan’s cheeks, and he fumbled but steadied himself.“Shit, yes.Of course you’ll want to do that.”Hogan started to get out of the bed in a rush, but the sudden movement caused the mattress to shift, and Kai inhaled sharply.“Shit, sorry, Kai.Let me help you get in the bathroom.I’ll tidy up while you’re in there and get us something to eat.”
“Coffee, too,” Kai demanded.
Hogan smiled.“Bossy,” he murmured.“But sure, coffee, too.Then you can answer my questions.”
