“Yes…”
Following him, his palm burning, so he rubbed it on his pants, choking a bit with that heart bouncing in his chest.
“Tomorrow the roof, then we are almost done. Just need to finish the walls and build the central fireplace.”
“Sounds great.”
Gabe looked up, but there was no sarcasm there. Damian’s eyes lost a bit in the flames. “Thanks for all your help.”
“We’re in this together, right?” A wry smile.
“Yes, but you could just sit around. After all, you’re the rich big boss guy and I’m only the glorified air waiter.”
Damian laughed softly. “Yeah… ok… I’m not anything here, and certainly not rich.” Wondering how it all fizzled away in his mind. Money.What did it matter, indeed? Nothing. Not here, where a lobster was worth its weight in gold. It dropped then, how that single thing around which his life had evolved was basically non-existent. Torn out of their world onto this lonely shore where nature was ruling, it had become meaningless. Had it ever had a meaning at all? The thought chilled him, a sudden nausea invading him. His back drenched, and he clenched his fists against the trembling of his hands.
“You’re unwell?”
“What…? No. I mean, yes. A bit.” Breathing a bit harder, his eyes into the night.
“Drink.” The word made him look at Gabe, but he was just holding a cup of water.
He took it, sipping it, his guts clenched. What was his life? Chasing what? That empire far, as if in a dream. He looked at Gabe. “I… I am not sure what I’ve done with my life…” His old self frowned at his words, a mild anger bubbling up at that confession, but he pushed it down, clinging to those silent hazel eyes. “Yeah… I mean, all that money… what for?”
Gabe shrugged. “After a while, I guess nothing’s enough.”
Damian watched the flames, thinking of all those days when he had arrived home so late, only Maddie was still up, sometimes. His kids gone to bed. Him, gone in the morning before they woke up.
“You could come home a bit earlier some days…”
He shot her a look, tearing his tie off, flinging his suit jacket to the floor. “Sure thing… but I need to work. Money doesn’t grow on trees.”
“They miss you… the kids…”
He turned to her, unbuttoning his shirt. “Well, that’s why you’re home, right? To make sure they have everything, and their stuff is taken care of. I can’t be everywhere.” Irritated, a button stuck, and he tore the shirt open, the buttons popping all over the room. “Fuck this…” That tidal wave of anger growing at her wide eyes in bed. “Fuck!” He walked close, half-naked, pointing a finger close to her face. “I work my ass off to provide for you and the kids! So don’t you dare make me feel guilty with your bullshit talk about how they miss me! This is again one of your tricks to drive me up the wall! It’s your job to explain to them that it is daddy who makes sure that they get whatever falls out of their fucking mouth, that they have nice rooms, a house, toys, and fantastic holidays! And all this is money! Money! So daddy needs to work, late, and sometimes is not even home for days. Right?”
She just nodded, her throat tight.
He whirled, raking his hair, going to the bathroom. “Fuck you, Maddie!” He turned and walked to the door. “I need a drink to calm down, because you managed, again, to fuck up a perfect day.”
Banging the door so hard, the paint chipped off the frame.
Soft, into that dark night. “I was there for Cassie’s but missed Kevin’s birth. Had an important meeting, then we went out to celebrate… I think I got there the next day. I can’t remember clearly.” He pulled a face, the flames dancing in his eyes.
Gabe tossed another log on the fire, sparks somersaulting like tiny fiery bugs. He didn’t know what to say, that tiny flame of hate rekindled by his words because Damian was everything he hated in this world, the embodiment of what he felt was wrong with it. Wealth. Privilege. Arrogance. Greed. Addicted to power fed on money and drugs. The only man left on the planet, as far as they were concerned. Meeting his eyes over the flames.
“Talk to me, Gabe. Just say something…”
“What?”
“I don’t know… anything… so we don’t have to listen to my fuck-ups.”
Sighing. “I don’t know what to tell you… maybe my fuck-ups were my failed relationships.”
“You failed, or the other one?”
“Kinda the same, no? They all ended up in a wreck. Always at a point when I thought it was for life.” That last one still tearing into his heart. “The last one hit hard. I am not getting any younger, so…”
Damian laughed in disbelief. “What? Not getting any younger? You’re young as fuck!”
