Sasha Ramirez
Istomped up the stairs and let myself into the apartment. My footsteps were muffled by faded carpeting as I went to knock on Renée’s door.
“Renee! I’ve got the rent. Please come out and take it or I’m going to spend it all on Chinese takeout,” I bluffed. Renée opened just as I was about to knock again.
“I’ll take that, thank you very much,” she said, snatching the money out of my hand. “Are you okay?” Renée added in a worried tone. “You look like you’ve been crying.”
I shook my head, trying to wave off the concern. “It’s nothing. Just a really rough day, is all.”
“Do you want to talk about it? I know we aren’t exactly friend-friend, but you can tell me if there’s something wrong.” She led me to the lone couch in our small living area. She sat on it and patted the cushion beside her.“What’s happened? Is it your mom? Is it Emilio?” she probed.
She’d always been impressed with how hard I worked. Truth was, I scraped together barely enough for rent and groceries. Yet I still sent money home religiously. She also knew my brother had recently joined a bad crowd; she’d overheard me chiding him about it.
“I got fired today. A customer tried to get frisky. I upended a glass of ice-water on his shirt. I didn’t know he was friendly with the boss. I got paid and escorted out by the manager.” I broke into tears again. “I can’t be unemployed, Renée. I have a lot of bills hanging over me.”
“I’m so sorry, Sasha, men can be such pigs! You know I’ve asked you to come to join me at the agency already. Leo is always looking for fresh faces, and you fit the criteria. You’re freakishly tall, you’ve got the body and looks of a model. And you are out of a job.”
“Renée, I told you I’m wary of the escort business. I don’t like the stories I hear about it. I’ll just go hunting for another job tomorrow. I’m sure I’ll find something.”
“Alright, then. If you do change your mind, though, you’re only one knock away from better checks, flexible work hours, and timely rent payments,” Renée finished with a grin.
“Thank you, Renée, really. But I’m pretty sure it’s not for me. Goodnight,” I said, getting up and going into my room.
The next morning, I dressed to embark on my job hunt.
God,I really need to clean up this mess,I thought yet again as I looked down at my messy floor. I grabbed my coat off its stand and glanced down. There was a brown envelope shoved under my bedroom door. I opened it up and found a note and some bills inside it.
I figured you might need to hold on to this in the meantime. You can just pay twice for next month. – R
I went over to her door and knocked. Figuring Renée was still sleeping, I hammered louder on the door. When she opened it and began to protest, I held my tears in, dove in and hugged her in silence. I didn’t know how else to show my gratitude. Renée didn’t have time to return the embrace. I pulled away, walking out the apartment just as quickly, before she could see me sobbing.
“Good luck!” Renée called out to the sound of the closing door.
∞∞∞
I tried to feign interest, but my mind was a thousand miles away. A waitress in bunny ears and a cotton tail walked past. I wished I could trade places with her, particularly on this night. I pushed myself to my feet and put the glass of wine down.
Whoosh!I was feeling lightheaded.
Fuck, there must be more to life than this.
This was not why I’d risked coming to New York again. I’d saved up all I could to come here at the age of 18. Dead-end job after dead-end job, my spirits had flagged. Losing the bartending gig was the final straw. After weeks without a single offer, I’d finally accepted Renée’s invitation. It had been months since I’d joined Leo’s escort agency.
Renée had been right. The money was a lot better. It would be better still if I could break my rule of not sleeping with the customers. I just couldn’t do it, though. It was hard enough putting myself in the company of these men each night. But I needed this job to give Mom and Emi a better life back in Mexico. I bit down on my lips and gave a sweet smile to the fidgeting man in front of me.
“If you'd excuse me, I have to use the ladies’ room.”
“Alright, Gingerbread,” he replied with a smile that showed too many teeth. He was sweating even though the air-conditioning in the lounge was blasting at full speed. Dark patches were beginning to appear under the arms of his suit. “Don't take too long,” he said, but his attention was directed at another waitress walking past as he ogled her.
“Of course,” I said, and disappeared into the small milling crowd. There was a short line of two other women in front of the restroom. They looked me up and down as if I was some sort of insect.
“Hey,” I mumbled in greeting. I leaned against the wall and waited. It took everything in me to stop myself going outside and hailing a cab. I fought to calm myself down.You’re an escort. That’s all,I kept silently saying to myself. It had been 10 months on the job, yet I still struggled with that.
I took a deep breath and reminded myself why I was doing this. The hostess job I’d finally taken was the only way I could have survived.
When I re-entered the lounge, I spied my “date” scooping nuts from a bowl and shoving them into his face. He looked like a pig at a trough. I pretended not to notice and plastered a demure smile on my face. I walked over to him. He was beginning to ripen with the stench of liquor and sweat. I had one mission for the duration of the night.To not throw up on him.
“Gingerbread! You hungry?” He was talking with his mouth full. I could see the ground paste in his mouth.Could this night get any worse?“I know the owner of the place. They have an in-house chef who can rustle up something if you’re hungry.” He checked his wristwatch as he spoke. I knew he was trying to come off as important and resourceful. “But they don’t do it for just anyone. You gotta have connections, if you know what I mean.” He bobbed his eyebrows. I gave a weak smile.
