Chapter 4
With Heavy Heart
Gale Fears
Her words rang in my mind as I took another swig of my drink.
“How easy it is for you to doubt me.” That’s what she had said. I remembered the broken look on her face, and the way tears had flowed from her eyes. Had it been real? Had she really been crying, or were they fake tears? Was she just acting, making one last attempt to fool me? Was she just saying all this for her own benefit? Was she just manipulating me again?
A part of me wished I had let her explain herself. A part of me wished I had not been so emotional and allowed her to clarify her side of the story. And yet I was scared. Scared to hear any more lies. Scared to get hurt again.
“One more shot,” I said to the bartender.
He slipped me another whiskey, and I drank it, finishing it instantly. I knew I was drunk. After all, I had been drinking ever since Hillary had left my office. I remembered what she had said about Daniel. It had to be a tall tale, after all. Daniel would never do anything like that. He was my best friend; he had been there for me for such a long time. He couldn’t possibly hurt me. And why? Why would he do something like this? What reason could he possibly have to hurt me? Why would he be doing this?
I felt a strange sense of uneasiness run through me. Like I was making some big mistake. I ordered another drink, my heart wrenching and throbbing with pain. I truly loved her. I cherished her, and I wanted her. I thought she was the one I was meant to be with. But she had just played with me. She had used me and manipulated me.
I had known heartbreak before with Stella, but it hadn’t been like this. It hadn’t been such excruciating pain. I hadn’t felt this torn, and this shattered. Maybe because I was used to Stella hurting me. Because when it all ended, I was already expecting it. I was used to her playing me, manipulating me, and making my life miserable. But with Hillary, I had been happy. Even through all the ups and downs, I had known that she was on my side. That she truly loved me and that I could trust her. But I had been wrong about it all. I had been wrong about everything.
Suddenly, I was filled with a wave of roaring anger. I hated her. I was dying of misery, piss drunk and aching for her, and she was probably finding someone else to be with. She was already making her next step, already planning who next to dupe. Why should she escape? Why shouldn’t she feel the pain I was feeling? Why shouldn’t she tremble the way I did?
I stumbled out of the bar, my vision double, and my head dizzy, but I didn’t care. There was only one thought in my mind. To get to Hillary. To shout at her and scream at her and demand answers. To ask her why she did what she did. And then maybe, hurt her. Hurt her the way she hurt me.
∞∞∞
“Hillary!” I shouted, banging on her apartment door. “Open the fuck up! Open this damn door! Hillary!” I shouted, collapsing against the door, unable to stand anymore.
My head was throbbing and aching as I banged on the door. Why wasn’t she answering? Of course, she wouldn’t answer. She had already moved on. Cut her losses and found something else to do.
The door suddenly opened, and I fell through the door, my head banging on the floor.
“Hillary isn’t here,” a voice said. “You should leave.”
“Erica?” I hazarded a guess, my head aching even worse. “You are her friend, Erica?”
“I said, Hillary isn’t here,” she repeated. “Look, I will call you a taxi and you need to go.”
“Please,” I said. “I just want to know why. I just want to know why she hurt me. Why did she play me like that? I loved her. I loved her so much—”
“She tried to tell you,” Erica said. “She said she would explain, but you told her that you hated her. You didn’t even let her speak and—”
“Where is she? Why won’t she come out here?” I stammered, anger fueled my entire body.
“She left,” Erica said. “She was betrayed, and she left. She is gone.”
“What? Where?” I asked. “Tell me. I need to know why she did this to me. Why did she use me like this?”
“She didn’t use you,” Erica said, scoffing. “She loved you. She truly loved you. She did it to save me, you idiot!”
“What?” I asked, completely confused. Something in Erica’s voice had me sober up more.
“Someone kidnapped me,” she said. “They held me captive, and they threatened Hillary. Whoever was behind it told her that if she didn’t steal that file, they would kill me. That if she told anyone, they would kill me. She was lost; she didn’t know what to do. So, she stole the file. She did it to save me!”
“No, you are lying,” I said, guilt coursing through me.
“Am I?” she asked. “Or do you just want to believe Hillary is evil? It is easier than accepting the real culprit behind it? Is it easier than accepting it is your best friend?”
“Heismy best friend,” I said. “Would you believe Hillary could do something like this?”
“No, because I know Hillary,” she said. “Likeyouknow Hillary. You should have trusted her and let her explain herself. But it doesn’t matter. She is gone now. And as for your proof, Hillary told me she heard Daniel talking to Stella in the restaurant I am working at. I can probably get you the CCTV footage and prove it to you. Hillary is on your side, Gale. She has since the beginning. She did what she did to protect me. Please don’t accuse her, please.
Her only fault was to make sure I don’t get hurt, don’t you see? Hillary was tricked, just like you did.”
