Feelin' frustrated, I rake my hands through my hair. "I shouldn't have let her leave."
"Nope. You shouldn't've."
I glance at Buddy and notice that he has somethin' tucked under his arm. "Did she leave that too?" I ask, motionin' towards the object he's holdin'.
He hesitates before handing it to me. "She left it in the apartment. I thought maybe you would want it."
I stare down at the photograph. It's a picture of Penny and me when were teens. I have my arm around her, and I'm starin' down at her like she's my whole entire world. "I look happy," I mutter.
"That's because youwere, Colt," Buddy retorts.
My eyes stay on the picture as the memory of that day inexplicably replays in my mind. "You took this picture." I hesitate, not pressurin' myself to remember, but lettin' the memory flow freely through me. I don't try to block it like I always do. "The three of us went to our favorite swimmin' hole by the old abandoned train tracks. We spent all day there, and you took this picture." I close my eyes for a moment. "On the way back, Penny cut her foot on a sharp rock. We wrapped her foot in my t-shirt, and the two of us had to take turns carryin' her four miles back to your truck."
Buddy raises a brow and asks, "Penny told you that?"
"No." I swallow hard before tellin' him, "I remember."
CHAPTER 25
PENNY
I DON'T THINK I've been so miserable before in my entire life. It's been a month since I returned back to New York, and things are going as well as could be expected. My days in New York are filled with traffic, paperwork, running errands, making and taking phone calls and people talking at me instead of to me. Tucker has been great with trying to get me settled in, but I'm starting to realize that New York will never feel like home.
Sitting in my office at the end of day, I finish the last of my paperwork and slowly recline back in my leather chair. I sigh as I stretch out my sore limbs and kick my high heels off under the desk, wiggling my toes to try to get the feeling back into them. Who knew being a campaign manager would be so damn hard? And maybe I'm just overdoing my job duties…because that's what I do…I'm an overachiever. I've always been that way. I think it was instilled into me at a young age to excel. Hell, my mama claims I could talk in full sentences at twelve months and I was walking way before that.
My cell phone rings, and I'm quick to check the caller ID.Speaking of the devil…or my mama, in this case."Hi, Mama," I answer.
"Hello, Penelope. How are you?"
"Fine," I say nonchalantly. My parents call a few times a week to check up on me. Shelby Rae and I have talked a handful of times since I moved. I haven't heard a peep from Buddy or Colton at all…not that I really expected to, but it would be nice to know that they care enough to call.
"How is Tucker's campaign going?"
I roll my eyes. She asks this question every time we talk, and I am starting to wonder why she calls so often when we really have nothing new to talk about. "Very well. The early polls are saying he's a shoe-in for state senator."
I can hear my mother clapping her hands on the other end of the line. "That's wonderful news! And how are you and Tucker doing?"
I cringe at her question. "Good." Tucker has taken me under his wing since I've been here in New York. We've spent almost every minute of every day together, and I could seriously use a break. I think often about returning home, but there is nothing for me to return to. Not anymore. There's a rumor going around the office that he was ring shopping last week. And so everyone is anxiously waiting for him to the pop the question to me…everyone except me. I honestly don't even know if I would tell him yes or no at this point. Some days I feel like running away, and others aren't so bad. One thing is for sure, though --- I'm not happy. Saying yes to an engagement that I don't really want would be the worst thing I could do. I don't love Tucker. How could I when I'm still in love with someone else?
I hesitate before muttering, "I think he's going to be proposing soon."
My mother doesn't say anything for a few seconds. Then she asks, "Penelope, why are you saying that like someone just died?"
"I…I don't know." I want to tell her that I hate it here. I want to tell her that I want to come home. I want to tell her so many things, but I don't. With tears gathering in my eyes, I quickly say, "Mama, I have to go. I'll call tomorrow. Okay?" I don't even give her a chance to say goodbye before I hang up the phone.
I stare up at the ceiling and force myself not to cry. That's all I ever feel like doing anymore. For the second time in my life, I regret leaving Willowbrook. I don't know what I was thinking to be honest. I thought things would be better, that I would feel better, but I was wrong. So wrong.
Yawning, I shut my computer monitor off for the night, slip my heels back on, grab my coat and purse and make my way out of the office building. I pull on a large, heavy coat and push through the main lobby doors. Even though it's only fall here in New York, it feels like winter to this southern girl. I hail a cab in record speed, thanking the heavens above for not making me wait on the dark street by myself.
Once inside my tiny apartment, I kick off my high heels and strip out of my coat. I make a quick call for a pizza to be delivered before I change out of my work clothes and into a comfy pair of pajamas.
Several minutes later, there is a knock at the door, and I quickly grab my money from the counter to pay the pizza delivery guy. But when I open the door, Tucker is outside.
"Hi, Tuck," I say with a lack of enthusiasm that I hope he doesn't detect. Tucker and I spend almost every waking moment together, but he never gets tired of seeing me after hours. It's not that I don't like Tucker. I do. But sometimes I just feel like I'm being smothered by his affection.
"Hey, Penny." He steps inside and scoops me into his arms. I breathe in his scent that isn't quite the scent that I long for. Colton always smelled so spicy and warm, and I could just melt into his arms. Tucker smells wonderful, but it's not what I want…what I crave.
I gently pull away from Tucker. "I'm waiting for a pizza. Do you want to join me?"
