I steel my nerves and turn to him. It's the moment of truth, and I need to know. Right now. "Did you sleep with her?"
"What?" he asks, clearly caught off guard.
"Did you have sex with Ruby Sue last night?"
He scrubs a hand over his face and blows out a sigh. "I…I don't remember."
"You don't remember?" I scoff. I can feel my heart break a little more, and I don't know how much more I have left that isn't broken. It seems like anymore all it does is shatter day after day. Shoving my finger into his chest, I say, "Oh, that's a great excuse, Colton, especially coming from you!" I know it's a low blow, but I had to take it. My heart is breaking, and I refuse to not make him hurt this time. If I'm going down, he's going down with me. "How could you do this to me, Colton? After everything I've done for you. How could you hurt me like this?"
I can see the pain in his eyes, but I can't believe the words that come out of his mouth next. "I never asked you to tag along behind me like a lost puppy, Penny. That was all your doing," he says with a smirk.
His words almost destroy me right then and there. I curl my hands into fists, my fingernails biting into my palms. "You're such an asshole!" I scream.
The cocky grin on his face instantly fades. "Don't turn this around on me, little miss Penelope Preston! You're the one who thinks you can make the past five years disappear! Well, sweetheart, I'm not that person anymore! The person you knew died at the bottom of that lake!"
His words pierce through me like a knife straight through my heart. What was I thinking was going to happen? That Colton would fall for me again and that we would live happily ever after? I've obviously been reading too many damn romance novels. Real life doesn't work like that. All this time I've been waiting for someone who clearly doesn't want me, who clearly will never want me the same way I want him.
All of my hurt and anger rushes to the surface, and I grab the first thing I can find. It's a picture of Colton and me when we were little kids. I throw it across the room, and the porcelain frame shatters against the wall. Then I grab another photo of us and another and another, destroying them in the same dramatic fashion. I reach for another photo frame, but Colton wraps his arms around me and holds my back tight up against his muscular chest. "Do you feel better now? Did you get it all out of you?" he hisses in my ear.
"No!" I cry, struggling to get out of his hold.
He grips me even tighter, holding me as my body is wracked with sobs and I struggle to breathe. "I'm sorry, Penny," he whispers against my ear. "I'm sorry that I can't be who you want me to be. I'm sorry that I can't love you the way you say I did."
His words are my undoing, and I go limp in his arms. He gently lowers me to the floor, and I sit down on the yellow and white flowered linoleum, staring through my tears at the mess in my kitchen and living room. Photos of us are scattered amongst the pieces of porcelain and glass, and it almost seems quite fitting. We are broken, and no amount of glue is going to fix us again.
He stands behind me, not moving. "Penny," he whispers.
I cringe at the sound of my name on his lips. I can't bear much more. He has the ability to irrevocably break me with just a simple look right now. "Please, Colt. Get out. I just…I really need you to go right now."
I don't breathe again until I hear the front door close and his heavy footsteps disappear down the stairs. After he's gone, I allow myself a few deep breaths and a few more tears before picking myself up. Then I set to work on cleaning up the mess I made literally and figuratively.
And what a mess it is.
* * * * *
COLTON
"PLEASE, COLT. GET out. I just…I really need you to go right now."
My chest is heavin' from emotions that I have no control over. I stare down at her sittin' on the floor with her back towards me. I just want to scoop her up into my arms and hold her, but I know she would probably fight me.Damn it. Why does she always have to fight me?
Instead, I reach down and pick up a picture before leavin' her apartment. I jog down the steps and stop before walkin' into the back door to the bar. I stare at the photo in my hands. We look older than in the one I have at home, the picture I first looked at when Penny came back into town. I turn it over and check for a date. Sure enough, a date in black sharpie is scrawled on the back. Two months before the accident. She must have been gettin' ready to leave for college. I turn it back over and stare at the two of us. I look so damn happy, and it kills me a little inside. I haven't been happy for such a long time, and the only time I've been happy is with her.
And now she fuckin' hates me.
I stare at the picture, absorbin' every detail of it. My arm is draped around Penny, and she's pulled up close to me. We're smilin' for the camera, and Penny has a shy look on her face that makes my heart skip an extra beat. She looks exactly the same, if not prettier now, but I definitely gained a lot of muscle mass over the past few years due to my gruelin' gym routine.
I groan in frustration. Why wouldn't Penny let me explain my side of things? I would tell her the truth. I would tell her that Ruby Sue spent the night. She kissed me and touched me, but it was all one-sided. We might have had sex…but I truly and honestly don't remember it. Wouldn't I remember it? The truth of the matter is that I don't want to have anything to do with Ruby Sue ever again.I want Penny.
However, on the other hand, I can understand why she's mad. If Tucker had spent the night with her, I would be fuckin' furious…even if it was innocent.Shit. I really fucked up this time. The only thing I can think to do is just give her time to cool off. Then I will explain my side of things, and we can go about makin' this thing between us work. And I seriously need to make it work. Now that I've had a taste of Penny, she has crawled her way under my skin. My thoughts are consumed by her. I'm not ready to let her go yet.
Maybe not ever.
"Hey, man, what's goin' on?" Buddy asks as he steps out of the back door of the bar.
I quickly tuck the picture into my jeans pocket and shrug. "Nothin'."
"Did you and Penny have a fight?"
