Penny's face tightens up as if she's desperately trying not to cry. "I know. I…" Penny's tough demeanor crumbles a little as her voice cracks. "It doesn't matter. I'm not leaving."
Her resolve doesn't sound as strong as it did before, and I wonder what it would feel like if Penny did leave. Would I miss her? Would I want her to come back? I don't know the answers to those questions. I'm still reelin' from the fact that Penny was in love with me…and still is. I've been treatin' her horribly, and all this time she's been dealin' with this inner turmoil. I suddenly feel like the world's biggest asshole.
Shelby Rae suddenly appears in the doorway. "Only employees are allowed back here. So unless you're gonna put an apron on and start cookin', I suggest you both leave," she says, glaring pointedly at Penny's parents.
Penny's father leaves first, not putting up a fight. I noticed that he didn't say a word during the argument either. Obviously Penny's mama is the only one fightin' her daughter tooth and nail over everything. Her dad is just sort of a passenger in all this drama.
Eventually, Penny's mama stalks out. Shelby Rae calls after them, "And don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!" She gathers Penny into her arms. "Are you all right?"
Penny nods. "Yeah. Thanks, Shelby Rae."
"Anytime." She hugs her tight before releasin' her. Shelby's eyes meet mine through the crack in the door, and she cocks a brow.
Clearin' my throat, I open the door and step out just as Shelby Rae leaves. Penny quickly tries her best to compose herself. "Hey, Colt. I didn't know you were in your office." She sounds embarrassed. "I just…I need a minute."
I'm not going anywhere. "I heard everything, Penny."
I can see her visibly tense. "Oh. I'm sorry."
I step forward. "I'm not. Why didn't you tell me, Penny? Why didn't you tell me the real reason you didn't come back?"
"Would it have made a difference?" she asks with her back still towards me.
"Maybe," I whisper. Her shoulders sag, and it looks like she's bearin' the weight of the world. I feel awful for how I've been treatin' her. She's endured so much over the past few weeks all because…because she loves me so much. I walk around and stare at her tear-stained face. She's so damn pretty it almost hurts to look at her.
Why couldn't I see her before? It's like I was blind, and now I can finally see her. I'm finally seein' Penny as more than just somebody tryin' to get under my skin and tryin' to make me remember things I don't want to remember. She's so much more than that now. But how do I even deal with that? Everything between us is fucked up. If I could turn back time and do it all over again, I would have broken things off with Ruby Sue for good. But a part of me wants to keep this distance from Penny, because I'll only end up hurtin' her in the end. Everyone I love gets hurt…or dies. It's inevitable. Instead of sayin' another word to her, I turn around and do something I'm good at --- I walk away.
* * * * *
PENNY
AFTER COLTON LEAVES without so much as a word, I clean myself up and get back to work. It's almost closing time when Shelby Rae waltzes into the kitchen. "It's probably none of my business, but…what the hell is goin' on with you and Colt?"
I'm mopping the floor when I stop and look up at her. "It's complicated."
"Complicated isn't even the right word. It's downright fucked up."
I chuckle. Shelby Rae never was one to mince words. With her flaming-red hair and big, pale-blue eyes, Shelby Rae is a force to be reckoned with. She was always a spitfire and told it how it was. Only Matt could contain her vivacious spirit, and he did a great job of keeping her in line…well, when she let him, that is.
"I think we need to talk about all this over a big glass of wine…or two," Shelby Rae announces.
I nod in agreement. "I could definitely use it after the day I've had."
She grabs another mop that's resting on the wall and dunks it into the bucket. "The sooner we get this done, the sooner we can drink," she says with a wink.
After we get the kitchen cleaned up, Shelby Rae and I go up to my apartment with a bottle of wine in hand, courtesy of Buddy. I think Shelby Rae could have asked for almost anything and he would have given it to her, no questions asked. It's so cute to see how Buddy is with her, and I hope that he can win her heart.
In no time at all, I'm polishing off my second glass of wine while Shelby Rae is still working on her first. She has to drive home, so I don't blame her for not drinking like the world is coming to an end…like I am. Once I've finished catching her up on everything that has happened since I've gotten back into town, she sits in silence for a long time.
"So do you think Colton will pull his head out of his ass and come around anytime soon?"
I shrug in answer to her question. The truth is I have no idea if Colton will ever have that ah-ha moment where he realizes how much I care about him and finally wants to focus on what we had together. That moment may never happen no matter how much I want it to.
"You want my advice?" she asks.
I nod. I've suddenly become mute. Maybe I'm afraid of how the wine will warp my answers.
"Ignore him."
