“Loyalties tae Laird Grant wouldnae be in our lives then. Laird Grant would mean nothing!” he hissed. “Please, think about it.”
“I cannae.” She walked around him, trailing her hands through her blonde hair in panic. She pulled the locks out of the braid she was fiddling with it so much. He had a wild vision of being the one to pull her hair, to bend back her neck and kiss her, to show her just how passionately they could make love.
He had been gentle their first time, determined to show her that he would never ever hurt her. Yet he was also intrigued to see, if they ever made love again, whether she had the same fire in her that she had when they were sparring.
“Please,” Kai whispered, his heart breaking. “Marry me, Ava.”
She halted in her pacing, her hands falling from her hair as she looked at him.
“Ye ken I would if I could.”
His heart shattered into pieces. He was now the one to turn on the spot in despair, looking at the clouded heavens and pleading for patience.
“Why nae?”
“Because I have a family. I have responsibility tae them all. Just as ye have responsibility tae yer family.”
“Responsibility is one thing.This…what ye’re willing tae dae, sacrifice yer own happiness fer the rest of yer life… that goes beyond it.Thatis madness.”
“It’s nae!” Her voice matched his in volume now.
Their argument bubbled over, but not out of anger, out of frustration.
“Would ye nae dae the same fer one of yer siblings?” Ava asked pleadingly. “Would ye nae dae it fer them?”
“That is beside the point.”
“It is nae, and ye ken it.” She thrust a finger toward him as he paced up and down, trudging through the snow. “I’m trying tae save Lyla from a life of misery.”
“And is there really nay other way than marrying Laird Grant. Marry me and I’ll dae everything I can tae save yer sister from the man who wants tae marry her.”
“Kai, listen tae me.” Ava stretched her hands out toward him. “Yer family’s money is yer elder brother’s tae use fer the clan and his family. Ye dinnae have the capacity tae help me faither.”
“This is unbearable.” Kai ran a hand down his face. “I cannae just watch ye marry him. I cannae dae it.”
Her breath hitched and she wiped her eyes again.
“Dinnae cry.” He moved toward her, cupping her cheeks and wiping the tears from her eyes. “I love ye. That is why I want tae be with ye.”
“I love ye too, and if I could be with ye– Kai!” she shouted at him as he pulled away.
Nae enough. Clearly, nae enough.
“What would ye have me dae? What else can I possibly dae, Kai? And be sensible with yer answer now. How could I marry ye and ensure me faither has enough money so that he daesnae have tae sell Lyla tae that man?”
Kai’s chest ached as he lowered his face into his hands.
“I dinnae ken!” he snapped. “I ken nay other way.”
“See? We are both broken by this. We must accept there is nay way that ye and I… that we…”
He lifted his head from his hands and looked at her. Her breath was shuddering now as she tried her best to stifle more tears.
“And is this really what ye want?” he asked. A part of him wanted to run now, to turn his back, in the hope that by somehow walking away from Ava, he could escape this pain, but he knew that if he left those woods, the pain would follow him anyway. Like a shadow clinging to his shoulders, it would always be there now.
“Of course, nae,” she spat angrily. “I feel as if I am being crushed by the weight of me faither’s expectations. The knowledge that I am the only one who can help Lyla out of this. None of this is what I want. All I want isye.”She threw her arms in his direction. “Yet I cannae have ye!”
“Ye can have me whenever ye want me.” He moved toward her, taking her arms and holding her close. “Any time ye want.”
