“There is something which has weighed on me for a long time. I have kept it a secret only between meself, those involved, and God. I couldnae bear tae reveal the secrets, for there would be much trouble if I did, but I havenae felt good about it since then. I have never felt easy keeping these secrets. I am old now, and I must share them. I must tell.”
Bryce stopped and looked up at Tobias. “Is that all?” his friend asked.
“Aye, that is all. And there are nae more pages in the journal. But it seems that she was helping unmarried women with their babies. Getting rid of them somehow, so that they wouldnae be shamed. That must be the secrets she wishes to reveal at long last?” Bryce queried.
Tobias tapped his chin. “Aye, I think so. There is more mention of that here, among other things. But a midwife and healer could have many secrets. It is too bad that we only have her journals and nae Conan McTavish’s. We cannae ken his secrets, but perhaps he was involved in this business somehow.”
Bryce took another sip of his whisky, and he thought about how they could use this to their advantage to solve the mystery. Who would they tell? Fergus, Athol? Those two were far too suspicious to be trusted with the information. But at least Tobais knew now, and he was in control of what happened in terms of the law.
“I think you should tell Lorna what you discovered. It will only bolster your argument that you were telling the truth,” Tobias said quietly. “That it is likely her mother was one of these women who needed help hiding her shame.”
“Aye,” Bryce said, staring straight ahead, “but I cannae say that I am looking forward to it.”
“I will find her, lad. You stay here.” Bryce nodded and sank into a reverie as he flipped through the pages of the journal again.
“What secrets?” he asked himself aloud. He didn’t like the thought that the midwife was getting rid of children already born. Lorna had escaped death, but had the midwife killed other children or thrown them into the river?
Finally, he heard footsteps returning, and Bryce felt his breath catch in his chest.
Will she forgive me?
Kindly, Tobias said, “Here we are, Lorna. Thank you for coming. I ken that you have had a busy morning.”
“Aye,” she said, looking right at Bryce as he stood to face her. “But me father willnae like us speaking here.” She looked around nervously. “Ye say that ye have news, but perhaps we should meet somewhere more private.”
“He is out at the moment. Besides, I do not think he would approve of you being alone in a room with two men. One of them being a man he finds suspicious. Come here,” Tobias said, motioning to the table. “No one will hear us right here at the far edge of the hall.
Bryce braced himself for a second rejection even after he told her the evidence they found. He was still silent as an idiot, but he sat down once she was seated, and he pushed the journal toward her.
“I will leave the two of you. I will just stand over there at the doorway if it is all right.” Tobias smiled, and Bryce reminded himself to thank his friend later. Tobias made himself scarce, and Lorna looked at the open page of the journal.
“These are Mrs. Creech’s, lass. The men finally found something in the croft. They brought the books here as soon as they found them. She had a secret to tell. Ye can see it.”
Lorna nodded, and her lovely lips were parted as she took in the words. Finally, her eyes turned to him, and they were not filled with anger. “What else have ye learned?” she asked, a little breathless.
Bryce ached to reach for her, but he held back. She would need to come to him if she wanted him. He told her what he and Tobias had found, and she nodded as he told her the information. “We think that Siusan was one of the women she helped, although we havenae read the journals fully. There may still be something we have missed.”
“But it is likely. Ye were right,” she said in a soft voice.
Bryce looked down, afraid to hope that she might consent to forgive him. He waited, and then he felt her soft touch on his hand. With eagerness, he clasped her hand and looked up.
“Bryce,” she said, “I thank ye for finding this and telling me about it.” She wasn’t meeting his eyes. “And ye were right about it all. I am still angry that so many people kept the information from me. I spoke tae me mother, and she revealed all, and she asked for forgiveness. But how can I forgive them after they held ontae this secret for so many years?”
Bryce reached out to brush a tear from her cheek, and her green eyes met his. “I am sorry for screaming at ye, telling ye things that I didnae mean. I was so angry. I still am angry, and I am so afraid of what it could all mean about the murders. But ye were right.”
“I am sorry, lass, for keeping the truth from ye. I thought that I was doing the right thing, but I can see what ye meant. I donnae ever want it tae appear as though I donnae trust ye or think ye capable. That is nae true, and it will never be true. Will ye forgive me?” he asked shakily.
She took a breath, still staring into his eyes. “Aye. I forgive ye. I love ye.” She leaned down to kiss his hand. When she sat up again, he moved forward to kiss her on the lips.
She paused, putting a hand to his shoulder to stop him. “But do ye forgive me? I reacted so strongly, like a child. I want people tae see me as a grown woman, nae flying from one angry mood tae the next. Yet I cannae seem tae stop doing it.”
He chuckled. “I didnae think that about ye. Ye were right tae be angry. Very right. And I like yer energy. Ye are full of passion, me love.”
She blushed, and he added, “I never want tae hurt ye again, lass. I will never hurt ye again.”
Swallowing, she replied solemnly. “I appreciate yer words, Bryce, but I donnae think that ye should make a promise like that. People hurt each other all the time, and people make mistakes. Ye cannae yet tell if ye will hurt me again or nae. Donnae make that promise.”
Bryce frowned, a little hurt by her words, but before he was able to say anything more, they heard Tobias clearing his throat, and turned to see Athol in the doorway.
