CHAPTERFIFTEEN
Connell
Connell couldn’t stop touching her. Her very touch lit a fire within him, making him burn with heat. His lips couldn’t stop touching hers. Her tongue entangled with his, enticing him to touch her more, to kiss her more. He drank her in as if she was the very water he needed, the water of life. His hands stroked up and down her body, pausing to cup her breasts before continuing their trail downward. She met every movement of his hips, grinding against him, and his heart skipped with each gasp leaving her lips. He felt his body tingling with every sensation of her and he didn’t think he could ever get enough.
Connell needed her out of these clothes. He needed to taste every inch of her. It had been so long since he had last touched her. He had never thought he would ever touch her again. Even still, he wondered if this was all a dream, if he would awaken in his bed, alone and in the dark. But this felt too real to be a dream. Her breath on his lips, on his ear, the feel of her smooth, warm skin beneath his palms.
His hands pushed up her skirts. His fingers brushed against her thigh. He loved the way her breath hitched, the way she whimpered for more. His hand continued stroking her thigh, inching closer to the treasure waiting for him at her core. She writhed underneath him, her hands clutching at his shoulders, his chest. He would have chuckled at her insistence if he wasn’t so aroused himself.
His hand found her womanhood, his fingers stroking the soft curls. A growl escaped his lips as he pushed forward, feeling how wet she was for him. He pulled away from her, watching her desire-filled eyes stare up at him, her lips red and swollen from his kisses. Her lips parted as his fingers circled around her little nub, a low moan escaping her. He clenched his jaw, trying to contain his own groans of desire as he watched her. Her legs opened for him, her body moving against his fingertips, searching for more. A low growl escaped him as one finger entered inside her, her body slowly sucking him in. A shiver rippled through him.
Her hands reached for him, and he found himself falling toward her, claiming her lips as his finger continued moving in and out of her. She was so warm, so tight. He felt as if he was getting lost in her. Her scent surrounded him, her warmth threatening to melt the ice surrounding his heart. She tugged at his leine, her hands sliding up his front.
“Connell,” she moaned against his lips, making his body shiver with need. “I’ve missed ye so much.”
Connell’s heart fluttered, a low groan escaping his lips.And I’ve missed ye,he wished to tell her, but the pain and the love made his throat constrict and he didn’t think he could utter the words without giving himself away. She kissed him long and deep, her tongue sliding against his, her teeth grazing his lip as he continued to move his fingers in and out of her. Oh, how he wanted to be one with her, how he prayed this was no dream.
Elsy pulled away from the kiss, her eyes closing as she cupped his face, as she nuzzled her nose against his. “It’s been too long,” she breathed.
And within an instant, all the warmth he felt went cold. Connell stiffened, his mind going to dark places as she continued to kiss his jaw, his neck.It’s been too long,her words repeated inside his head.What does she mean?he wondered as her fingers stroked up and down his front.
He stared down at her. And he realized this was indeed no dream. It was a nightmare in the making. She had been with the man who took everything from him, and although it was a choice she’d had to make in order to survive, he still didn’t think he could forgive her for it. He scowled at the floor as she kissed his neck. McCormick’s dark eyes, his dark hair, his cruel smile entered Connell’s mind. He could still see him on the battlefield, welding a blood-stained sword.
Connell clenched his jaw.Did Elsy kiss McCormick the same?he wondered bitterly. Did she moan and writhe, begging McCormick for more? Did she cry out his name? Connell felt cold, the warmth in him dying and leaving him bitter.
“Connell?” Elsy whispered, pulling away from his neck.
He turned to her, finding her staring up at him, her fiery hair framing her face. Her green eyes were still filled with desire, but she looked more concerned than aroused. She stroked his cheek, pushing the dark locks away from his face.
“Is everything all right?”
Connell didn’t say anything as he pulled his hand out from her skirts. He picked himself up, stalking toward his desk, scowling at the garnet ring still lingering on top of it. How could he be so foolish? How could he forget so easily? His hands straightened his leine. He could still feel Elsy’s warmth, his fingers still slick with her, but he no longer felt any arousal at the thought.
All he could think about was McCormick inside her, defiling her, making her moan and cry out for more.It wasn’t her fault,he told himself.She didn’t know what kind of monster slept in her bed.But the thought of McCormick being with her, as a man and wife should be, not only made tears spring to Connell’s eyes, but made his shoulders quiver with rage.
“Connell,” Elsy asked, her voice tinged with worry that made his heart twinge with guilt. “What’s wrong?”
Connell didn’t say anything. It was stupid of him to touch her, kiss her, make her think there could be anything more between them. Their love was broken. She had moved on while he had left her for his revenge. They had gone their own separate ways. There was no going back, not now after he gave up so much to get this far.
“Connell.” He stiffened, feeling her hand on his arm. “Why did ye stop?”
His gaze slid to hers, narrowing on the red mark on her neck, her disheveled hair, her wrinkled gown. Still, all he thought was of McCormick kissing her, touching her neck, moving in and out of her.
“Connell--”
Connell wrenched his arm away from Elsy. “Ye think I’d want McCormick’s widow?” he asked bitterly, forcing the words out as if they wanted to remain stuck in his throat. Pain coursed through him as the words lingered in the air. He felt as if he had been stabbed through with a sword, but he couldn’t allow her to get close to him. There was only pain in his life. There was only room for vengeance and nothing else.
“Why are ye being so cruel?”
Connell turned at the sound of her sniffing, finding her wiping the tears from her cheeks. The tension in his body eased, his fingers twitching to pull her toward him, to apologize and wish the words away. However, Connell remained still. He couldn’t let her inside. She had married a traitor, bedded him, and forgotten about Connell. He couldn’t allow himself to care for her.
“I’m not being cruel,” he said gruffly. “I’m speaking the truth. And I’m tired of listening to yer lies.”
Elsy stepped away, her hands fisting, her back straightening. “I’m not lying to ye, Connell. Why won’t ye believe me?”
“Because yer McCormick’s widow.”
Elsy shook her head, taking another step back. “What does that have to do with anything?”
