Chapter Fourteen
Three days and three nights had passed with nothing from Heloise, and Aidam was losing his mind. Worse still, the men were beginning to notice. He didn’t think they put his foul mood over the last few days together with Ellie, but they knew it was a woman. The good-natured ribbing and guessing they were putting him through was a special kind of torture only made worse by the lack of any contact from the woman herself.
It was only a kiss, you fool. He thought to himself as he left the keep and passed through the practice fields. She doesnae need tae avoid me like I’ve come down with th’ plague.
He knew she hadn’t made good on her threat to leave the keep. He still kept watch over her, albeit from afar. With what happened between them and how she fled the cottage, he thought it best if another guard kept watch and reported back to him. It enabled him to keep his sanity. More than once, he thought of barging into her chamber to finish what their kiss had started or to beg her not to go through with the marriage to his uncle. But each time, he thought better of it and knew with another guard on her door who could potentially tell his uncle it would keep him at bay should he lose the battle with himself.
The men were still sparring in the fields. It was late, and Aidam did not feel like joining them. What was the point? His heart was too full for his mind to focus on battle maneuvers. He loved his uncle. There was no denying the man was his family. The only family that he had left aside from Jemina. How could he betray the man by coveting his bride-to-be?
“But it’s more than covet, ye mad fool,” he said out loud into the cooling night air. He was in love with Ellie. He knew it in his bones, even if he was too cowardly to say it out loud. He had loved her since he first laid eyes on her as a child. She was the only woman he thought about. No woman he dallied with could come close to her. He was convinced he would outgrow it. His affection for the lass was nothing more than youthful fancy, yet that wasn’t the case. Just as it wasn’t the case that the kiss they shared was merely a kiss. Nay, it was more. It was more for her as well, or she would not have fled as she did. How could he reach her?
“If what the men say is true, I gather ye may have found th’ trouble ye were lookin’ for a few days back?” Damon walked up next to him and clapped him on the shoulder.
“Aye, and then some,” he admitted. It was no use trying to lie to his friend. He would see through any tale Aidam tried to spin.
“And by th’ way ye been mopin’ about th’ place, it seems ye didnae have th’ outcome ye wanted.”
“Nay, I didnae,” Aidam admitted.
“Where ye off tae then?”
“Melrigg, a drink? More than a dram, perhaps enough to regain the senses I’ve seemed tae have lost. Care tae come with?” He asked his friend.
“Melrigg seems a wee bit far for a drink, does it nay? Why not the village? Wynne will nae like me gone for th’ whole night, but if ye’d settle for th’ village, I can get half a night for ye?”
Aidam had initially thought the four-hour ride to Melrigg was what he needed to clear his mind of Ellie and their kiss. He couldn’t help but think returning to the inn where they had stayed would also remind him she intended to marry his uncle. It could help him forget. But looking at his friend, he realized the company Damon proposed was a much better option.
“Aye,” he replied. “I’d love tae have yer ear.”
“Then let us do it!” Damon chortled and clapped him again on the back. Perhaps this night away from thoughts of Ellie was precisely what he needed.
* * *
Ellie pushed at the meat on her plate as she glanced around the great hall. She told herself she was watching the people of the clan as they merrily broke bread together for their evening meal, but it was a lie. The main meal had been over for the better part of an hour. The only clan members left were a few stragglers and the serving girls who stayed until after the Laird ate. Sinclair was nowhere to be seen, as had been his routine since she arrived at the castle. But Ellie was not looking for Sinclair. She was looking for Aidam.
She had purposefully avoided him ever since their encounter at the cottage. She didn’t know what to say. He made her feel things. Things she was not ready to admit she felt, but there was no denying it. Aidam was more than an irritating distraction. She had real feelings for him. And she was not ready to face those feelings and the destruction they would cause. When she thought back on that second kiss in the cottage, the familiar wet heat pooled at her center. When she closed her eyes at night, all she saw was Aidam. She had allowed herself to become aroused by him to the point of distraction.
From his behavior as of late, it appeared he was as affected by what happened between them as she was. At least if the servants' talk was to be believed. Ellie tried her best to avoid gossip at all costs, but the maids were in a titter trying to guess the lass that had put Aidam Sinclair in such a foul mood. She wanted to feel pride to have that kind of power over the man, over any man, but instead, she was in anguish. She knew she had to stay away from him, yet he was all she thought about.
On the second night, she almost broke. She wanted to speak with him and opened her chamber door expecting to find him there, standing guard, but instead, she was greeted by a gangly young clansman named Padrig.
“Aidam said he had something important, my lady,” Padrig had told her, giving her a giant smile. “He said he only trusted me tae keep ye safe. I’ll be here all night through.”
She gave the lad a gentle smile and closed the door after bidding him good night. She then ran to her bed and sobbed. Aidam was done with her then. She had been wrong, and Aidam had not been in the keep since. The worst part was Ellie was no closer to solving the problem of marrying the Laird as she had been before her afternoon with Aidam complicated matters even further. Sinclair was still more determined than ever to avoid her. Ellie had never felt so truly and utterly alone.
“Heloise, can I trouble ye with a question?” Jemina was suddenly next to her, snapping her back into the present.
“Jemina,” Ellie replied. “Please, you must call me Ellie. All my friends do.”
“And are we friends?”She heard Aidam’s whispered response in her mind. It was what he said in the cottage. She shook her head to clear him from her thoughts.
There was no reason to take her insecurities out on Jemina, and as of late, she had come to enjoy her time with the lass. It was a welcomed distraction from obsessing over Aidam and the Laird. “You may ask me whatever ye wish. Ye never trouble me.”
“Ye remember th’ lad from the feast th’ other evening?” She asked. “The one I danced with, Colin?”
“Aye,” Ellie smiled. Jemina’s face was so pure and eager. She could tell the lass really did like the boy. She thought back on their dance and how well the two seemed to suit one another on the dance floor.Just like Aidam and I,she thought. Before she could explore that thought deeper, Jemina continued pulling her back.
“Well, his Da has already left the keep, but Colin stayed an extra day tae practice with the clansmen. He leaves th’ day after tomorrow. And…well..he asked me tae have dinner with him in the village at the tavern. I really want tae go, but I ken Da will say nay. What do I do?”
