Or kiss him.
She started. Where had that thought come from? It was a purely physical thought, of course. Kissing should be the last thing on her mind. It unsettled her to know her mind was capable of such a thought. She really was a grieving mess. Were she to return to herself at all, she knew she must leave this place as soon as possible. Yes, that was what her mind was telling her with such errant thoughts. She needed to put distance between herself at the Highland keep; escaping her emotions would be the best and fastest way to put herself to rights.
“Ye ken,” he said. “There’s room in there for two.”Aidam was still watching her, and his expression made clear he somehow knew exactly where her thoughts were traveling.
She scowled, looking away. “I dinnae want yer company,” she said shortly. “I barely tolerate ye as it is. Yer uncle is the only reason I bother.”
Lachlan Sinclair was a kindly man, fatherly, honest, and comfort in these days when her own father was so cruelly taken from her. Would that Lachlan had passed any of that onto his nephew, and they’d all be better for it.
Aidam tutted, not easily deterred. “Come now,” he teased. “Ye call that being a good hostess? Move yerself over and let me in.”
He always talked to her in the same teasing tone since they were both wee bairns. In another world, one where she was less broken and angry, it would have made her smile. She might even have been able to return his trite banter.
But I lost me smile. Only the fire still lives.
“Take it, then,” she said, pushing past him as she climbed out of the alcove. “I’ll go elsewhere.”
He blinked at her in surprise. “Ellie, wait,” he said. “I’m only trying to be friendly. I’m sorry if I genuinely upset ye. I just thought—”
“I dinnae need yer help, Aidam Sinclair. Yer’s or anyone else’s!” She half-shouted, instantly embarrassed by her own misplaced rage. Ignoring the tender look in Aidam’s eye, she stormed along the corridor away from him, toward one of the side doors. She did not need or want his pity. He could save the looks for the maids who clamored for his attention and leave her to herself.
Ellie would rather go back out into the rain than show Aidam her grief and weakness. She’d go back to her father and enjoy the silence, away from traitorous mothers, concerned little brothers, and confusing handsome lads and their teasing.
Let the rain pour atop her head and quench her fire, if only for a moment. Until she was able to escape, what else could she do?
