“I can’t explain it much better; my husband is not an understanding man.”
Kieran could swear he saw a deep, dark pain in her eyes as she spoke about her husband.
“You lied too, you know,” she murmured, “You left out the part of being a laird; you let me think you were just an ordinary commoner.”
“Ye never asked, did ye, Lady Vivien? I may have omitted that part of my life – I didnae want you tae treat me any differently than ye did because I am a laird. But ye lied straight out. I asked ye, and ye made up a story tae placate me.”
Kieran’s grasp on his civility was slipping; he worried that there was a potential chance that he would say something he regretted to Vivien.
At the same time, what did it matter? She was married; there was no hope of them ever being together.
“I know.” Vivien finally met his eyes square on. “I have a reputation to protect. No matter what I do or what I want, I am Lady Stone, for better or worse. I can only apologize for my deception. I cannot take it back.”
Kieran detected a note of determined strength in her voice. Vivien had gone from not looking at him to strongly defending herself.
“Aye, that is true, isn’t it? It is a deep cut to be humiliated so. But I have matters to discuss with you that are more important than deception and half-truths,” Kieran said, beginning to pace the length of the room. He found he was far too agitated to stand still. He needed to move for fear of blurting out things that he really could not afford to say to the Sassenach, who had broken his heart without trying.
“I don’t know how much use I will be to you, but if I can help, I will. If I cannot, I will relay your concerns to Lord Stone.” The look of anguish that crossed her face was far too obvious for Kieran to ignore.
He wondered just what was going on in her marriage. Vivien seemed to feel pain each time she mentioned her husband – but it was not Kieran’s place to interfere or ask her what was troubling her.
“If I have no choice in the matter, then I will speak my piece an’ leave ye tae yer life as Lady Vivien Stone. Ye can let yer husband know his attempts at showing me that I am beneath him were not unnoticed.”
Kieran frowned, his fists clenched, nails digging into the palms of his hands.
He wished he had not come to the English noble’s castle. It would have left his dreams of Vivien in his arms intact. The despair he felt at losing that dream warred far too heavily with his fury at her husband.
He wondered which emotion would win.
Chapter Ten
Vivien could not deny that this exchange with Kieran was one of the most painful experiences of her life.
Her body craved his touch; her lips burned with the desire to feel the pressure of his kiss again. She felt like a traitor to Reginald. She knew that these thoughts were inappropriate. No matter how much she despised him, he was her husband, and that was a binding covenant. She berated herself for thinking of anything even remotely unfitting for a lady of her standing.
She could not control it any more than she could control her heart thudding in her chest.
Vivien could tell Kieran was more upset than he was saying just by watching his body language. He walked stiffly, his back as straight as a plank, his lips pursed while she spoke, and when he thought she wasn’t looking at him, his hands trembled at his sides.
Vivien wished she could change the past. She wished she could go back in time and tell him the truth instead of causing him – and herself – this pain.
“I will relay all that you say to my husband,” she responded. Kieran stopped pacing and turned to look at her. She met his eyes, trying to search their depths for any sign of anything other than fury. She came up short; his eyes were cold and distant. Vivien felt her heart break a little bit more.
They had no chance of being together, but for some reason, Vivien could not let that hope die.
“My men were attacked the day before we met. By Englishmen. I can only assume they were men who report to your husband,” Kieran sighed, closing his eyes briefly, brow furrowed, “I lost several men in the attack. It was a needless battle; there was no reason to engage in combat with us. We were on our own land, out-numbered and purposely pushed into the altercation.”
Vivien nodded, her confusion causing her to pause for a moment before replying.
“What do you think Lord Stone has to do with this, if anything?”
Kieran’s eyebrows lifted as he looked at her in disdain. Vivien shrank before that look – she couldn’t bear the feeling of distress she felt. She thought herself an absolute idiot for not understanding what he was implying. Reginald’s voice repeated that she was stupid in her mind, over and over.
Vivien hated that Kieran was looking at her with anything other than the kindness and gentleness that had been in his eyes only a few days before.
“If it isnae obvious, I believe he either kens something abou’ the attack – or he orchestrated it himself. There has been no trouble with the English in these parts for the last five years. As my new neighbor, I can only come tae the conclusion that his men are responsible for the deaths o’ my own.”
Vivien felt the blood drain from her face. Reginald was a cold, cruel, calculating man. But could he really bring himself to attack men without provocation?
